The Friday Irregular

Volume 2, Number 23
28 January 2000

Edited by and copyright ©2000 Simon Lamont

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Coming soon: v2 FAQ (any questions?) and photos pages.


ON THIS DAY IN HISTORY

Saturday 29 January   -   First broadcast of Desert Island Discs, 1942
Sunday 30 January   -   Vietcong captured the American Embassy in Saigon, 1968
Monday 31 January   -   A.A. Milne died, 1956
Tuesday 1 February   -   Rene Descartes apparently stopped thinking, 1650
Wednesday 2 February   -   It's Groundhog Day!
Wednesday 2 February   -   It's Groundhog Day!
Thursday 3 February   -   Felix Mendelssohn, composer, born, 1809
Friday 4 February   -   Sri Lankan Independence Day (since 1948)

 

SOMETHING TO WATCH

Listings from any or all of Digiguide (the free downloadable listings service for Win'9x), Radio Times and Heat.

ITV listings for Granada region. Other regions may vary. (R) indicates a repeat.

Saturday 29 January
 
00:15   BBC1   The Andromeda Strain (1971)
18:35   BBC2   Gormenghast (R, from Monday)
21:05   BBC2   Serpico (1973) Based-on-true-story tale of honest cop in corrupt force, with Al Pacino
23:40   BBC1   The X Files. Dreamland (Feature-length; R, from Wednesday)
23:55   BBC2   Invasion of the Body Snatchers (1956) Still-effective sci-fi classic. They're here! You're next!
 
Sunday 30 January
 
01:15   BBC2   Night of the Living Dead (1968). Seminal zombie horror
01:40   Ch.4   Rush (1991) Undercover Narcs drama, with Jennifer Jason Leigh and Jason Patric
17:00   Ch.4   Stargate SG-1. Tin Man. The SG-1 team's consciousnesses are implanted into robots
17:00   Ch.5   Superman (1978) Classic superhero action
18:00   Ch.4   Time Team. Archaological investigation in Birdoswald, Cumbria.
18:45   BBC2   Star Trek: Voyager. Drone. A Borg drone is created in a transporter accident.
22:00   BBC2   Restoration (1996) Period drama with Sam Neill, Meg Ryan and Robert Downey Jr. *FILM PICK OF THE WEEK*
 
Monday 31 January
 
00:10   Ch.5   NHL Ice Hockey. Philadelphia v Washington followed by highlights of last week's Detroit v Toronto game
01:25   Ch.4   Babylon 5. Convictions (R)
18:00   BBC2   The Simpsons. The Springfield Connection
18:00   Ch.4   Friends. The One With Frank Jr. (R)
21:00   BBC2   Gormenghast. Steerpike continues his ascent while Titus longs to escape and Irma looks for a husband. *TV PICK OF THE WEEK*
23:20   BBC1   Beast. Should We Hug? (R, from Thursday) Veterinary sitcom. Nick looks for a replacement for Briony.
 
Tuesday 1 February
 
00:45   Ch.5   Highlights of Superbowl XXXIV
13:25   Ch.4   Madame Bovary (1949). Vincente Minelli's production of Flaubert's novel, with Jennifer Jones and James Mason
18:00   BBC2   Doctor Who. The Genesis of the Daleks (Part 1, R) Classic Tom Baker era sci-fi
21:00   BBC2   The Fall and Rise of Reginald Perrin (R) Cult sitcom
 
Wednesday 2 February
 
15:30   Ch.5   The Belarus File (1985) Kojak TV-movie
18:45   BBC2   Star Trek: Deep Space Nine. One Little Ship. The Jem'Hadar take over the Defiant
22:20   BBC1   The X Files. How the Ghost Stole Christmas. Christmas Eve finds Mulder and Scully trapped in a haunted house.
 
Thursday 3 February
 
00:00   BBC1   Ghost Story (1981). Atmospheric if not particularly scary revenge horror.
00:20   Ch.5   NHL Ice Hockey. Florida v Montreal followed by highlights of Monday's Philadelphia v Washington game
18:00   BBC2   Star Trek: The Next Generation. Sub Rosa. (R) Dr Crusher has a ghostly encounter.
21:00   BBC2   Meet the Ancestors. Archaeology in Lihou Priory, Guernsey
21:30   BBC2   Horizon. Supervolcanoes. How a huge volcano under Yellowstone National Park could produce a volcanic winter
21:00   Ch.5   Hijacked: Flight 285 (1995) Aircraft hijacking thriller with Anthony Michael Hall and Ally Sheedy
22:00   BBC1   Beast. Frightening Shorts. Veterinary sitcom. Kirsten and Briony have a night out, while Nick turns to psychotherapy... for pets.
23:35   Ch.4   Ally McBeal. The Real World (R). Richard hires "sub-zero" Nell Porter
 
Friday 4 February
 
00:35   Ch.4   Disinfo Nation. Counterculture documentary
21:00   Ch.4   Friends. The One Where They Are Going To Party! (R)
22:00   Ch.4   Frasier. The Dog That Rocks the Cradle.
22:30   Ch.4   So Graham Norton. Comedy chat show
23:30   ITV   Dharma and Greg. The Paper Hat Anniversary.
 

QUIZZICAL QUOTATIONS

Answers, as usual, next issue or from the usual address.

Last issue's quotations were:

 

Weird World News

A few weeks back we reported on the thieves who were arrested after their on-the-job photos of their raid on a Tesco supermarket were taken to the same store to be developed. Tesco's film development section is now going for a official record after amassing an archive of over 24,000 photographs of blurred fingers accidentally captured on film around the world and subsequently developed by them - they don't charge for ruined prints and so have collected the photos, currently residing in a warehouse awaiting assessment from the Guinness Book of Records before going for recycling. According to Andrew Clark, Tesco's head of film processing "The third finger of the right hand is the most popular finger to photograph because it tends to fall naturally in front of the lens."

An unemployed German announced this week that he plans to appear on television offering his wife for a night of sex in exchange for $500,000. When asked her opinion, she commented "It's only one night. Perhaps it would be a nice change."

In a bid to encourage more people to write letters the Postal Ministry of South Korea is introducing four stamps depicting flowers, printed with violet-scented ink on 25 February and a heart-shaped stamp in April.

With shades of the national election year when Party Politics won the English Grand National, the Presidents Pace horse race in Edmonton, Alberta this year was won by a horse called Clintons Cigar.

There are two golden rules of staging an armed robbery: make sure nobody can recognise you, and make sure they at least think you're armed, even if you aren't. James Pocton was obviously not aware of the former, and not too clued up on the latter. His target: the local village post office. At 6'7" tall and seriously obese, he was already known to most people in the village where he had lived for over twenty years, but for good measure the counter clerk just happened to be his neighbour who, unsurprisingly, refused to hand over any cash. Pocton then told her that he was armed, pointed a large cucumber at her, having forgotten to put his "gun" in a bag to disguise its true identity. He received a jail term of two-and-a-half years for attempted robbery.

 

IRREGULAR WEBSITE OF THE WEEK

A little while ago we brought you the "Things the label says not to do" site, with - amongst other stuff - their supersonic spud gun. Along similarly enthusiastic lines is George Goble's barbecue lighting technique (from cold to ready-to-cook in 3 seconds). Loads of pictures, and an mpeg video...

http://ghg.ecn.purdue.edu/

THE AMAZING NOT-QUITE-RANDOM LOTTERY PREDICTOR!

Madame Jennifer, our in-house psychic predicts the following numbers will be lucky:

8, 20, 21, 32, 35, 42


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