The Friday Irregular

Volume 8, Number 19 (TFIr ^#201)

17^th October 2003

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FAQ: http://gizmo1.demon.co.uk/scblbiog/scblfaq.htm (last updated 25 May 2003)

UndeadCam: http://www.gizmo1.demon.co.uk/undead/ (last updated 16 October 2003)

Film/TV/CD Archive: http://gizmo1.demon.co.uk/scblbiog/filmtv.txt & http://gizmo1.demon.co.uk/scblbiog/cd-list.txt - 634 CDs, 2843 films (354 on DVD) and 10282 TV shows (674 on DVD), totalling 13125 items, at 21 September 2003.

ON THIS DAY IN HISTORY

Friday 17 October - Columbus sighted San Salvador, 1492. Political reformer John Wilkes born, 1727. Cornwallis defeated at Yorktown, 1781. Composer Frederic Chopin died, 1849. Actor Montgomery Clift born, 1920. Actress Joan Hickson died, 1998. Happy birthday to: musicians Eminem & Wyclef Jean (both 31), soccer player Graham Le Saux (35), actor George Wendt (55), sports commentator Harry Carpenter (78), playwright Arthur Miller (88).

Saturday 18 October - Artist Antonio Canaletto born, 1697. Philosopher Henri Bergson born, 1859. Computer pioneer Charles Babbage died, 1871. First commercial long-distance phone line (Chicago-NYC) opened, 1892. British Broadcasting Corporation established, 1922. Thomas Edison died, 1931. Happy birthday to: musician Wynton Marsalis & actress Erin Moran (both 42), actor Jean-Claude Van Damme (43), tennis player Martina Navratilova (47), actress Pam Dawber (52), musician Chuck Berry (77). Today is: Alaska Day (transfer from Russia, 1867) in Alaska. Last Quarter Moon.

Sunday 19 October - King John (r.1199-1216) died, 1216. Satirist Jonathan Swift died, 1745. Napoleon started retreating from Moscow, 1812. Physicist & 1908 Nobel laureate Ernest Rutherford died, 1937. Proclamation of the People's Republic of China, 1949. Cellist Jacqueline du Pre died, 1987. Happy birthday to: South Park's Trey Parker (34), actor Jon Favreau & musician Sinitta (both 37), singer Jennifer Holliday (43), writer Philip Pullman (57), actor John Lithgow (58).

Monday 20 October - Architect Sir Christopher Wren born, 1632. Canadian-US border established at the 49th Parallel, 1818. Author Thomas Hughes born, 1822. Life saver Grace Darling died, 1842. Poet Arthur Rimbaud born, 1854. Herbert Hoover, 31st US president (1929-33) died, 1964. Happy birthday to: musician Dannii Minogue (32), comedian Mark Little & actress Niamh Cusack (both 44), musician Mark King & actor Viggo Mortensen (both 45), actor Earl Hindman (61). Today is: National Heroes' Day in Jamaica. Hurricane Thanksgiving Day in The Virgin Islands.

Tuesday 21 October - Poet Samuel Taylor Coleridge born, 1772. Horatio Nelson killed in action at the battle of Trafalgar, 1805. Alfred Nobel, inventor of dynamite and founder of the Nobel Prizes born, 1833. Thomas Edison perfected the commercial light bulb, 1879. 144 killed, including 116 children, in the Aberfan coal tip slide, 1966. Beat writer Jack Kerouac died, 1969. Happy birthday to: soccer player Paul Ince (36), actor Angus MacFadyen (40), musician Julian Cope (46), actress Carrie Fisher (47), cricketer Geoffrey Boycott (63), writer Ursula K. Le Guin (74). Today is: Compact Day in the Marshall Islands

Wednesday 22 October - Composer Samuel Arnold died, 1802. Cabinet maker Thomas Sheraton died, 1806. Composer Franz Liszt born, 1811. Actress Sarah Bernhardt born, 1844. Artist Paul Cezanne died, 1933. The US National Debt passed $1 trillion, 1981. Happy birthday to: musician Shaggy (35), actress Valeria Golino (37), ice skater Brian Boitano (40), actor Jeff Goldblum (51), actress Catherine Deneuve (60), writer Doris Lessing (84). Today is: Angam Day in Nauru.

Thursday 23 October - Lexicographer Pierre Larousse born, 1817. Robert Bridges, Poet Laureate 1913-30, born, 1834. Cricketer W.G. Grace died, 1915. Pneumatic tyre inventor John Boyd Dunlop died, 1921. Start of the battle of El Alamein, 1942. Singer Al Jolson died, 1950. Happy birthday to: TV presenter Cat Deeley (27), actress Beatie Ednay (41), musician 'Weird Al' Yankovic & director Sam Raimi (both 44), soccer player Pelé (63), broadcaster Johnny Carson (78). Today is: Last day of Libra. United States Day. Anniversary of the Declaration of Independence (1956) in Hungary. Chulalongkorn Day in Thailand.

THE WISDOM OF...

This week, Maya Angelou:
There is no greater agony than bearing an untold story inside you.

FILM QUIZ

A mixed bag of quotations this week. Answers next week or from the regular address.

I always just hoped that, that I'd meet some nice friendly girl, like the look of her, hope the look of me didn't make her physically sick, then pop the question and, um, settle down and be happy. It worked for my parents. Well, apart from the divorce and all that.

I don't believe a man can consider himself fully content until he has done all he can to be of service to his employer.

This house is so full of people it makes me sick. When I grow up and get married, I'm living alone.

If we ain't outta here in ten minutes, we won't need no rocket to fly through space.

- Rise and shine, campers, and don't forget your booties 'cause it's coooold out there today.
- It's cold out there every day. What is this, Miami Beach?
- Not hardly.

Last issue's lines were:

Kill a few people, they call you a murderer. Kill a million and you're a conqueror.
-- Cliffhanger

Oh... This is nice, I don't understand why women complain about waxing.
-- What Women Want

I'm guilty of cheating on my wife, of being a bad husband and a bad Christian.
-- The Gift

It seems that every time we meet, I have nothing but bad news. I'm sorry about that, I truly am. But for what it's worth, you've made a believer out of me. Good luck, kiddo.
-- The Matrix Reloaded

...there was only one name I could think of; the most beautiful name in the wide world.
-- Forrest Gump

WEIRD WORLD NEWS

Strange stories from around the world, some of which might be true...

DUMB CRIMS... We're starting this week with a crim who was both dumb and unlucky. A 36-year-old who for legal reasons was reported as just Arkadiy V wanted to flee Russia into Latvia and bought a stolen passport in St Petersburg, then pasted his own photo into it and headed for the border. Guards there might not have recognised his face, but they certainly knew the name on the passport - it belonged to a wanted murderer. Arkadiy had to confess to presenting a false identity to state officials when he was arrested on suspicion of murder. This week's dumbest crim though is the Japanese teenager who confessed to 43 previously unsolved thefts after he tried to steal cigarettes from a vending machine and got his arm caught. Attempts by fire-fighters to free him failed, and police officers had to locate the key for the machine. Other dumb crims this week include: the Dutch burglar scared off by a pet rabbit; the German who buried a 100 euro note to stop himself wasting it a week before his birthday, then decided to buy himself a drink on his birthday but forgot where he had buried it and ended up digging a bed-sized hole in a city park; the Norwegian who didn't know that the ambulance he stole had a GPS tracking system, which enabled the police to stop him after just 8 miles.

OH, SHOOT! If you're thinking of flying a light aircraft in Serbia it might be a good idea to check the local papers for wedding announcements first, after a two-seater plane was accidentally shot down by wedding guests near Kraljevo partaking in the traditional practice of firing guns in the air. The plane's left wing burst into flames and it crashed into power lines. The two men aboard - neither of whom, it turned out, held a pilot's license - survived but had serious injuries.

DAVID WHO? Never mind the Blaine-in-a-box, Briton Mark McGowan, who last month rolled a monkey nut with his nose for seven miles to 10 Downing Street to protest about student debt will start another endurance feat on November 14 - he'll be sitting in a tub of baked beans for 8 hours a day over 12 days in a shop window with a string of sausages wrapped around his head and two chips (fries) stuck up his nose to promote traditional British cuisine.

SPORTS ROUND-UP... The 2003 World Pole-Sitting championships have ended after 165 days - because of the weather. The three remaining competitors, two Poles and a German, who were constantly monitored by sensors to ensure that they stayed seated on 15x23" boards atop their poles and were allowed to come down for 10 minutes every two hours were hoping to beat the 196-day world record, but rain and temperatures below freezing persuaded them to make a deal to all quit at the same time (another competitor whose tactics had been to loudly insult the others was disqualified after he fell off his pole.) Both men's and women's titles at the World Conker Championship last weekend (see TFIRs passim) were won by British competitors Brian Stewart and Debbie Oaks. Chess grandmaster Ruslan Ponomariov became the first player to be disqualified during a major tournament this week after his mobile phone started ringing during a game. 93-year-old Bob Fishwick claiming to be the oldest golfer in Britain to get a hole-in-one.

ANIMAL ROUND-UP... A crow which was attacking people on the streets of Berlin was finally captured this week after police put out schnapps-laced cat food for it. At last report it was recovering from the hangover in an animal sanctuary. German charged after teaching his dog to perform a Nazi salute (charges later dismissed but owner facing other Nazi-related charges). A rat in a Brussels supermarket that had evaded all attempts to trap it for a month finally met its comeuppance when it tried to take a pack of cheese from an 80-year-old female customer who knocked it unconscious. The baby elephant whose birth was broadcast over the internet two years ago has died. A German shepherd who had been adopted from a Maine animal shelter three years ago found her way back there this week, a journey of 150 miles. A single-carriage train in Japan was brought to a halt last weekend by a swarm of millipedes on the track.

STORIES WHICH ALSO CAUGHT OUR EYE THIS WEEK: A Russian man faced with a paint stain on his trousers that regular washing wouldn't shift decided to add a litre of gasoline in the washing machine - the resulting explosion blew out his kitchen and two internal walls. British European Union official wants Trafalgar Square and Waterloo Station renamed to avoid insulting the French. 104-year-old Honduran finally marries his 65-year-old girlfriend after 50 years together. 130 McDonald's restaurants in Britain offering tours of the kitchens to try and attract customers.

ENTERTAINMENT BRIEFS

Film: The 1975 Rocky Horror Picture Show to get its Singapore premiere next month. Bulldozer maker Caterpillar Inc. suing Disney over George of the Jungle 2 straight-to-DVD film for portraying "bulldozing bullies" than could have a "negative impact on children [...]" Daryl Hannah wants to quit acting for directing. Hugh Grant also considering quitting. John Travolta inks for Get Short sequel. George Clooney to lens US-set Gulf War vet thriller The Jacket in Scotland next year. Johnny Depp inks for Pirates of the Caribbean sequel. Finding Nemo tops UK box office. Steve Martin offered Clouseau role in new Pink Panther film. Hitch-Hiker's Guide to the Galaxy film to finally start shooting next Spring - no word on castings yet. Kill Bill Part 1 tops US box office. Entertainment Weekly names producer Jerry Bruckheimer the most powerful person in the entertainment industry. Actors joining protest against MPAA screener DVD ban. Titanic tops best-ending movie poll and of The Shawshank Redemption, the original The Italian Job, Casablanca and The Usual Suspects. Tickets for US December 16th 9-hour Lord of the Rings trilogy screenings sell out in hours.

TV: David Blaine due to leave his box this week - we can't stand the tedium of waiting. Doctor Who's Daleks voted top TV villains in GMTV poll. NBC remake of Coupling flops, now planning to remake The Office. Phoenix Nights breaks TV DVD sales record in UK. ITV1 set for UKP60 million cash injection/revamp next year. Phil Redmond planning DVD special to continue Brookside after its TV broadcast ends. James Baker reappointed head of Sky One. James Garner returning to TV for 8 Simple Rules. ABC planning 'The Kennedys' miniseries. AbFab season 5 starts on BBC1 tonight.

Music & Radio: Yoko Ono approves plans for a John Lennon musical. Mother Theresa: The Musical playing in Roman theatre. Prince apparently now doorstepping for Jehovah's Witnesses. Wyclef Jean hit by food poisoning. Quadruple DVD set of The Rolling Stones' world tour out next month. AC/DC one-off UK reunion show sells over 4000 tickets in first four minutes on sale. Tickets for the Duran Duran reunion earlier this week sold out in five minutes. Fourth Bob Dylan London gig added after planned three shows sell out. Ms Dynamite honoured for anti-gun campaign support. Bruce Springsteen, Bob Dylan and Bono planning Nashville Johnny Cash tribute. Vernon Kaye hired by Radio One. Over 50 hours of "lost" radio shows including a Gregory Peck piano recital returned to BBC archives after call for listener recordings. Virtual Sinatra show finally opens in US after technical problems.

Books: D.B.C. Pierre wins Booker Prize for debut novel Vernon God Little. Six Arthur Conan Doyle manuscripts to be auctioned for charity. Philip Larkin's Whitsun Weddings tops British poetry poll.

Obits: jazz trombonist Carl Fontana (75), actress Florence Stanley (79), Scottish entertainer Fran Watt (81), actor/dancer Brian Blades (84), actress Victoria Horne Oakie (91).

TECH BRIEFS

MS issues yet more security warnings about its software, releases test 64-bit version of Windows Server 2003. Data recovery firm Kroll Ontrack produce their annual top ten list of strange ways data was lost - including the man who shot his laptop in frustration and a server that ran full time for years but was never dusted. Global PC sales rise 15%. US Supreme Court considering whether Child Online Protection Act violates First Amendment rights - again. BT targeting British gamers for broadband. Mozilla 1.5 and Firebird 0.7 browsers released (we use Firebird under XP and Linux here). Linux 2.6.0-test7 kernel released this week. SuSE 9.0 Linux distro out. Brazilian government planning move to open source. Verisign to sell off majority of Network Solutions. Apple signs marketing deal for iTunes with Pepsi. AOL planning lower-cost access under Netscape brand name. UK government soon likely to adopt European Union Copyright Directive (similar to the US Digital Millennium Copyright Act) to combat file-sharing.

WEBSITE(S) OF THE WEEK

A couple for the techies this week starting with the World Wide Web Consortium's XHTML site - this is the next step on from HTML for web site creation.
http://www.w3.org/TR/xhtml1/
Whether you're switching to XHTML or just want to make sure your HTML is OK, the Consortium also has a very useful and free validator service.
http://validator.w3.org

THE AMAZING NOT-QUITE-RANDOM LOTTERY PREDICTOR!

Madame Jennifer, our in-house psychic predicts the following numbers will be lucky:
13, 16, 18, 19, 36 & 48.
You can consult Madame Jennifer online at the Daily Irregular:
http://www.gizmo1.demon.co.uk/li/

AND FINALLY...

A beautiful woman is shopping in her local supermarket when she is approached by a man. The first thing she notices is that he is wearing a wedding ring, so she is a little surprised when he says "Excuse me, but you're very beautiful. Can you talk to me for a minute or two?"

"Look, pal, you're married, but if you just want to talk, that's fine," she says.

The man hastily apologised. "Oh no, I didn't mean anything like that," he said, "it's just that I lost my wife somewhere in here, and every time I talk to a beautiful woman she appears out of nowhere within seconds."

...end of line

Friday 17 October	-	Columbus sighted San Salvador, 1492. Political reformer John Wilkes born, 1727. Cornwallis defeated at Yorktown, 1781. Composer Frederic Chopin died, 1849. Actor Montgomery Clift born, 1920. Actress Joan Hickson died, 1998. Happy birthday to: musicians Eminem & Wyclef Jean (both 31), soccer player Graham Le Saux (35), actor George Wendt (55), sports commentator Harry Carpenter (78), playwright Arthur Miller (88).

Saturday 18 October	-	Artist Antonio Canaletto born, 1697. Philosopher Henri Bergson born, 1859. Computer pioneer Charles Babbage died, 1871. First commercial long-distance phone line (Chicago-NYC) opened, 1892. British Broadcasting Corporation established, 1922. Thomas Edison died, 1931. Happy birthday to: musician Wynton Marsalis & actress Erin Moran (both 42), actor Jean-Claude Van Damme (43), tennis player Martina Navratilova (47), actress Pam Dawber (52), musician Chuck Berry (77). Today is: Alaska Day (transfer from Russia, 1867) in Alaska. Last Quarter Moon.

Sunday 19 October	-	King John (r.1199-1216) died, 1216. Satirist Jonathan Swift died, 1745. Napoleon started retreating from Moscow, 1812. Physicist & 1908 Nobel laureate Ernest Rutherford died, 1937. Proclamation of the People's Republic of China, 1949. Cellist Jacqueline du Pre died, 1987. Happy birthday to: South Park's Trey Parker (34), actor Jon Favreau & musician Sinitta (both 37), singer Jennifer Holliday (43), writer Philip Pullman (57), actor John Lithgow (58).

Monday 20 October	-	Architect Sir Christopher Wren born, 1632. Canadian-US border established at the 49th Parallel, 1818. Author Thomas Hughes born, 1822. Life saver Grace Darling died, 1842. Poet Arthur Rimbaud born, 1854. Herbert Hoover, 31st US president (1929-33) died, 1964. Happy birthday to: musician Dannii Minogue (32), comedian Mark Little & actress Niamh Cusack (both 44), musician Mark King & actor Viggo Mortensen (both 45), actor Earl Hindman (61). Today is: National Heroes' Day in Jamaica. Hurricane Thanksgiving Day in The Virgin Islands.

Tuesday 21 October	-	Poet Samuel Taylor Coleridge born, 1772. Horatio Nelson killed in action at the battle of Trafalgar, 1805. Alfred Nobel, inventor of dynamite and founder of the Nobel Prizes born, 1833. Thomas Edison perfected the commercial light bulb, 1879. 144 killed, including 116 children, in the Aberfan coal tip slide, 1966. Beat writer Jack Kerouac died, 1969. Happy birthday to: soccer player Paul Ince (36), actor Angus MacFadyen (40), musician Julian Cope (46), actress Carrie Fisher (47), cricketer Geoffrey Boycott (63), writer Ursula K. Le Guin (74). Today is: Compact Day in the Marshall Islands

Wednesday 22 October	-	Composer Samuel Arnold died, 1802. Cabinet maker Thomas Sheraton died, 1806. Composer Franz Liszt born, 1811. Actress Sarah Bernhardt born, 1844. Artist Paul Cezanne died, 1933. The US National Debt passed $1 trillion, 1981. Happy birthday to: musician Shaggy (35), actress Valeria Golino (37), ice skater Brian Boitano (40), actor Jeff Goldblum (51), actress Catherine Deneuve (60), writer Doris Lessing (84). Today is: Angam Day in Nauru.

Thursday 23 October	-	Lexicographer Pierre Larousse born, 1817. Robert Bridges, Poet Laureate 1913-30, born, 1834. Cricketer W.G. Grace died, 1915. Pneumatic tyre inventor John Boyd Dunlop died, 1921. Start of the battle of El Alamein, 1942. Singer Al Jolson died, 1950. Happy birthday to: TV presenter Cat Deeley (27), actress Beatie Ednay (41), musician 'Weird Al' Yankovic & director Sam Raimi (both 44), soccer player Pelé (63), broadcaster Johnny Carson (78). Today is: Last day of Libra. United States Day. Anniversary of the Declaration of Independence (1956) in Hungary. Chulalongkorn Day in Thailand.