The Friday Irregular

Issue #350 - 28 September 2012

Edited by and copyright ©2012 Simon Lamont
tfir@simonlamont.co.uk

The latest edition is always available at http://www.gizmo1.demon.co.uk/li/tfir/index.htm
The archives are at http://www.gizmo1.demon.co.uk/tfir/archive/index.htm
(Unless otherwise indicated dollar values are in US dollars)

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^ WORD OF THE WEEK
grodelicious
  - food that looks uneatable but tastes great [US slang, 'grody' (gross) + 'delicious']


^ ON THIS DAY IN HISTORY

Friday 28 September   -   Philosopher Confucius born, 551 BCE. Wenceslaus I, Duke of Bohemia (immortalised in "Good King Wenceslaus"), assassinated, 935. William the Bastard invaded England so he would be remembered as William the Conqueror, 1066. Irish brewer Arthur Guinness born, 1725. The start of the Siege of Yorktown in the American Revolutionary War, 1781. Moby-Dick author Herman Melville died, 1891. Sir Alexander Fleming discovered penicillin, 1928. Actress Brigitte Bardot born, 1934. Tennis player Althea Gibson died, 2003. Ask a Stupid Question Day in the US. World Rabies Day.
 
Saturday 29 September   -   Artist Tintoretto born, 1518. Henry Robinson opened the Office of Addresses and Encounters in London, 1650. Statesman Robert Clive, 1st Baron Clive, aka Clive of India, born, 1725. Poet Michael Denis died, 1800. The Blackpool tramway opened, 1885. Writer Emile Zola died, 1902. Actress Emily Lloyd born, 1970. Space Shuttle mission STS-26, the return to flight mission after the Challenger disaster, launched, 1988. Compulsive hoarder Edward Trebus died, 2002.
 
Sunday 30 September   -   Mathematician Michael Maestlin born, 1550. Engineer James Brindley died, 1772. Mozart's Die Zauberflöte (The Magic Flute) premiered in Vienna, 1791. Architect Decimus Burton born, 1800. Inventor Rudolf Diesel died, 1913. Babe Ruth became the first baseball player to hit 60 home runs in a season, 1927. Actress Monica Bellucci born, 1964. Aldwych tube station on the London Underground closed, 1994. Actor Marius Goring died, 1998.
 
Monday 1 October   -   The Battle of Gaugamela, 331 BCE. Gerard de Ridefort, grandmaster of the Knights Templar, died, 1189. King Henry III of England born, 1207. Artist Frans Floris died, 1570. First publication of the News of the World tabloid in London, 1843. Activist Annie Besant born, 1847. Concorde broke the sound barrier for the first time, 1969. Actor Rupert Friend born, 1981. Singer Lena Zavaroni died, 1999. World Vegetarian Day.
 
Tuesday 2 October   -   Composer Jacquet of Mantua died, 1559. George Washington sent the United States Bill of Rights to the States for ratification, 1789. Slave rebellion leader Nat Turner born, 1800. John Logie Baird performed the first test of a functional television system, 1925. Nobel Prize-winning chemist Svante Arrhenius died, 1927. Singer/songwriter Don McLean born, 1945. The Twilight Zone premiered on CBS television, 1959. Actress Michelle Krusiec born, 1974. Actor Rock Hudson died, 1985. International Day of Non-Violence.
 
Wednesday 3 October   -   Gaul leader Vercingetorix surrendered to Julius Caesar, 52 BCE. Saint Francis of Assisi died, 1226. Composer Sebastian Anton Scherer born, 1631. A warrant for the arrest of Rob Roy MacGregor was issued, 1712. Cricketer Johnny Briggs born, 1862. Inventor Elias Howe died, 1867. The German Democratic Republic ceased to exist as Germany was re-unified, 1990. Paralympic athlete Jenny McLoughlin born, 1991. Actor Roddy McDowall died, 1998. German Unity Day.
 
Thursday 4 October   -   The Gregorian Calendar was implemented in Italy, Poland, Spain and Portugal, in all of which the next day was October 15th, 1582. Richard Cromwell, Lord Protector of England, Scotland and Ireland, born, 1626. Artist Francesco Albani died, 1660. The first U.S. Open Men's Golf Championship was played, at Newport Country Club, Rhode Island, 1895. Chemist Carl Josef Bayer died, 1904. Singer/songwriter Bridget St John born, 1946. Sputnik I, the first artificial satellite, was launched, 1957. Pet Shop Boys musician Chris Lowe born, 1959. Entertainer Sir Norman Wisdom died, 2010. World Animal Day. The start of World Space Week.

^ THE WISDOM OF...

This week, Rod Serling, with the introduction to the first series of The Twilight Zone [viz. Tuesday, above]:
There is a fifth dimension beyond that which is known to man. It is a dimension as vast as space and as timeless as infinity. It is the middle ground between light and shadow, between science and superstition, and it lies between the pit of man's fears and the summit of his knowledge. This is the dimension of imagination. It is an area which we call the Twilight Zone.

^ FILM QUIZ

A mixed bag of quotations. Answers next issue or from the regular address. Last issue's quotations were:

^ WEIRD WORLD NEWS

Strange stories from around the world, some of which might be true...

YARRR! Suspiciously hitting the headlines the day after International Talk Like a Pirate Day was the news that 51-year-old old English woman Alison Whelan and a friend had hijacked a Devon ferry, and she had been claiming to be Captain Jack Sparrow, of Disney's Pirates of the Caribbean film franchise. She had called paramedics claiming to be having a fit, but when they arrived Locke turned violent and the medics opted to wait on shore until police arrived. At that point Whelan cast off the moorings of the 45-foot passenger ferry and it drifted away as she shouted her claims to be a "a pirate" and "Jack Sparrow". Crashing into other boats the ferry caused thousands of pounds' worth of damage before police finally caught up with it a mile away. Whelan was found to be both drunk and under the influence of hallucinogens, and was sentenced to 122 days in prison.

BLOODY HECK! A Scottish man has been in court accused of behaving aggressively with a black pudding. 47-year-old Bradley Davidson is alleged to have acted "in a threatening or abusive manner which was likely to cause a reasonable person to suffer fear and alarm" and shouting and throwing said black pudding across the room in his Perth flat last May. Separately he was also charged with kicking a child, kicking down a door and shattering a glass panel. Black pudding is a British "delicacy" consisting of cooked congealed pig's blood in a sausage casing. Davidson's case will go to full trial next month.

THE WHOLE TOOTH! Scientist in Australia have identified the oldest known dental filling, in a tooth with a beeswax crown in a segment of a 6500-year-old human lower jaw, identified as being from a late-20-something male. CT analysis shows that the filled crack reached right down though the tooth's enamel to the dentine below and would have caused considerable pain if untreated. While the team, from Wollongong University and the Australian Nuclear Science and Technology Organisation, cannot confirm whether the tooth was filled before or after death (as part of a ritual) their belief is that it was done while the man was alive.

RAM RAIDING. An sports shop in the Austrian ski resort of St Anton has been invaded - by a flock of 80 sheep. A spokesman for the Intersport shop suggested that one sheep might have seen its reflection in a mirror and wandered in to investigate, with the rest of the flock following. The sheep caused thousands of pounds' worth of damage, and lawyers are negotiating with the farmer who owns the sheep over reparation. If the name Intersport sounds familiar, it was another branch of the chain that was invaded by a cow last year - with the cow going on to star in TV ads for the chain after her owner had to pay for everything she had eaten or trampled, right down to several sports bras.

FRESCO UPDATE. The 80-year-old Spanish woman, Cecilia Gimenez, who ruined a C19th fresco of Christ in a Spanish church during a botched amateur attempt to restore it is now demanding royalties from the church, near Zaragoza, after her transformation of the artwork into something resembling a monkey became international news and attracted tourists from around the world, with budget Irish airline Ryanair even offering deals to visit the town to see the fresco. Ms Gimenez' lawyers say she wants any money awarded to her to go to charities supporting muscular atrophy patients.

IN BRIEF: East London schoolgirls photographed doing the Mobot and Usain Bolt's lightning bolt poses - in the 1940s. Mexicans eat an average of 430 eggs per year. Police called to remove man dressed as the Burger King from a rival McDonald's restaurant in Rome. Ponds on London's Hampstead Heath invaded by aggressive American crayfish. Ig Nobel awards presented to UK/US team who devised formula to predict the shape of a ponytail, team who studied why coffee spills from a moving mug, and a team who researched how chimpanzees can recognise each other from their behinds. Turkish divers scrambled to rescue drowning woman found that it was a sex doll. Scientists studying 170-year-old potatoes to learn more about the Irish potato famine. 5000-year-old oak tree trunk found under Norfolk field. Over 200 skinny dippers take to the water at Druridge Bay in England in attempt to raise money for charity and set world record; not enough people, say Guinness.

^ ENTERTAINMENT BRIEFS

Hugh Bonneville to play Mr Stink in TV adaptation of David Walliams' book. Slipknot joining Iron Maiden and Rammstein as headliners for next year's Download festival. Channel 5 acquires UK broadcast rights for new series of American Idol. UK media regulator Ofcom declares BSkyB fit and proper to hold broadcasting licence but criticises former chairman James Murdoch. EU/US regulators clear takeover of EMI by Universal Music on condition that it sells some of its most valuable labels. Next year's Academy Award nominations to be announced earlier than this year, ahead of Golden Globes. Authorised Chitty Chitty Bang Bang sequel among nominations for Roald Dahl Funny Prize for children's books. Stephen King's Doctor Sleep, the sequel to The Shining, to be published in September next year. BBC postpones final episode of Good Cop in wake of shooting of two female officers in Manchester. Scarlett Johansson returning to Broadway for lead in Cat on a Hot Tin Roof next January. Film critic Roger Ebert to be honoured at Sundance Festival for support of independent filmmaking. Simon Russell Beale dislocates finger on-stage at National Theatre. Box set of Amy Winehouse's BBC performances to be released in November. Louvre opens Islamic art wing. Dame Helen Mirren to play Queen Elizabeth II again, this time on the West End stage in The Audience. Emma Kennedy wins Celebrity Masterchef. UK National Television Awards to honour Olympic and Paralympic stars with special group Landmark Award. The Lone Ranger crewmember dies on set while preparing a pool for underwater sequence. The Script holds UK #1 single spot ahead of Example and Psy; charity release of autotuned remix of Nick Clegg (viz. below) charts at #143. The Killers take #1 UK album chart spot, ahead of P!nk and The Script. Thriller End of Watch and horror House at the End of the Street jointly take US film #1 box office ahead of Trouble and the Curve and 3D re-release of Finding Nemo; takings down 25% on last year. First part of The Hobbit trilogy selected for Royal Film Performance in December. Channel 4 commissions sequel to The Devil's Whore. Dame Helen Mirren to receive honorary European Film Academy award. Coen brothers developing Fargo TV series for FX. Fifty Shades books finally knocked off top of UK books chart by The Hairy Dieters. Feist wins Canada's 2012 Polaris Music Prize for Metals album. BBC denies plan to move "light news" section of Breakfast back to London. The Casual Vacancy, J.K. Rowling's first adult novel, gets mixed reviews, warnings of unsuitability for young Harry Potter fans. Sir Trevor Nunn to be inducted into Broadway's Theater Hall of Fame. Filmmakers launch campaign to promote correct colour/brightness/contrast settings for TVs. UK government consulting on ways to provide and promote ebook lending through public libraries. Former News International boss Rebekah Brooks, others, to face trial next year in wake of phone hacking scandal. Former London home of Pink Floyd founder members sold for £1.2m ($1.95m). Coachella festival bosses offering to ban meat from entire site in effort to reunite The Smiths. ParaNorman tops UK box office. Director Rob Reiner, stars to reunite for 25th anniversary celebration of The Princess Bride. Piers Morgan's US TV talk show finally gets good ratings - while he's away on holiday. Julian Clary, Julie Goodyear in talks to develop sitcom. LMFAO deny permanent split rumours. The Nolans reuniting for farewell tour. Olympic and Paralympic organisers considering options over NBC's heavily criticised coverage of Games.

Emmy Awards - Drama Series: Homeland. Comedy Series: Modern Family. Miniseries or TV Movie: Game Change. Variety, Music or Comedy Series: The Daily Show. Lead Actor in a Drama Series: Damian Lewis (Homeland "Marine One"). Lead Actress in a Drama Series: Claire Danes (Homeland "The Vest"). Lead Actor in a Comedy Series: Jon Cryer (Two and Half Men "Frodo's Headshots"). Lead Actress in a Comedy Series: Julia Louis-Dreyfus (Veep "Tears"). Lead Actor in a Miniseries or Movie: Kevin Costner (Hatfields & McCoys). Lead Actress in a Miniseries or Movie: Julianne Moore (Game Change). Supporting Actor in a Drama Series: Aaron Paul (Breaking Bad "End Times"). Supporting Actress in a Drama Series: Maggie Smith (Downton Abbey "Episode One"). Supporting Actor in a Comedy Series: Eric Stonestreet (Modern Family "Treehouse"). Supporting Actress in a Comedy Series: Julie Bowen (Modern Family, "Go Bullfrogs!"). Supporting Actor in a Miniseries or Movie: Tom Berenger (Hatfields & McCoys). Supporting Actress in a Miniseries or Movie: Jessica Lange (American Horror Story).

^OBITUARIES

Actor Johnny Lewis (28), broadcast journalist Mike Baker (55), UK TV comedy producer Michael Hurll (75), soccer player/manager John Bond (79), singer Andy Williams (84), composer/lyricist Billy Barnes (85), actor Herbert Lom (95).

^ WEBSITE OF THE WEEK

This made the news here in the UK this week after Deputy Prime Minister Nick Clegg broadcast an apology for failing to keep to a Liberal Democrats' pre-election promise over university tuition fees. Within 24 hours it had been autotuned and remixed by Alex Ross and James Herring into this song.
- http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KUDjRZ30SNo

^ THE AMAZING NOT-QUITE-RANDOM LOTTERY PREDICTOR!

Dumbledore Bear, our in-house psychic predicts that the following numbers will be lucky:
5, 11, 19, 23, 35, 42

^ AND FINALLY...

  Little Jennifer's somewhat corpulent Uncle Bill had come to stay and was sitting in the living room with her parents before dinner, when there was a thudding from the stairs and Little Jennifer appeared in the doorway, clutching her teddy bear and dragging a large suitcase behind her. "I'm all packed, Mummy!" she said proudly.

  Her mother looked puzzled. "What are you packed for, Little Jennifer? We're not going anywhere."

  Little Jennifer looked at her parents with a confused expression on her face. "But Daddy said this morning that Uncle Bill will eat us out of house and home!"


^ ...end of line