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Issue #504 - 30th November 2018
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| Contents | — – o o O o o – — |
^ WORD OF THE WEEK
hibernaculum |
Friday 30th November - Emperor Otto II withdrew from besieging Paris, 977. Edmund Ironside, King of England, died, 1016. Italian admiral Andrea Doria born, 1466. Optician and astronomer John Dolland died, 1761. Spain officially transferred the Louisana Territory to France, which would transfer it to the United States 20 days later, 1803. Writer Mark Twain born, 1835. Pink Floyd's The Wall was released, 1979. Photographer Laura Gilpin died, 1979. Actress Elisha Cuthbert born, 1982. Cities for Life Day (International). Saturday 1st December - Byzantine princess, scholar and physician Anna Komnene born, 1083. Henry I, King of England, died, allegedly from eating "a surfeit of lampreys", 1135. Henry V of England entered Paris, 1420. Sculptor and founder of the eponymous waxworks museum Marie Tussaud born, 1761. The Decembrist revolution in Argentina began, 1828. Surveyor and geographer George Everest died, 1866. Seamstress Rosa Parks was arrested after refusing to give up her bus seat to a white man in Montgomery, Alabama, 1955. Singer-songwriter Julee Cruise born, 1956. Comic book artist Russ Manning died, 1981. World AIDS Day. Sunday 2nd December - Warlord Ma Yin, King of Chu in the Ten Kingdoms, died, 930. The University of Leipzig opened, 1409. Composer and music theorist Agostino Agazzari born, 1578. Cartographer Gerardus Mercator died, 1594. Napoleon Bonaparte crowned himself Emperor of the French, 1804. Artist Georges Seurat born, 1859. Writer and wife of Karl Marx, Jenny von Westphalen died, 1881. The U.S. Senate voted to censure Joseph McCarthy, 1954. Actress Lucy Liu born, 1968. World Computer Literacy Day. Monday 3rd December - Roman emperor Diocletian died, 311. Berengar I of Italy was crowned Holy Roman Emperor, 915. Luthier Nicola Amati born, 1596. Illinois became the 21st state of the U.S., 1818. Social reformer Octavia Hill born, 1838. Lens maker and physicist Carl Zeiss died, 1888. The Pioneer 10 space probe sent back the first close-up pictures of Jupiter, 1973. Actress Anna Chlumsky born, 1980. Illustrator Adrienne Adams died, 2002. International Day of Persons with Disabilities. Tuesday 4th December - Cyrus the Great, King of Persia, died, possibly in battle, 530 BCE. Poet Persius born, 34. Kings Henry III of England and Louis IX of France agreed to the Treaty of Paris, 1259. Philosopher Thomas Hobbes died, 1679. Socialite and salonnière Juliette Récamier born, 1777. The Canadian brig Dei Gratia found the abandoned but mostly undamaged Mary Celeste, 1872. Writer and software developer Eric S. Raymond born, 1957. Historian Hannah Arendt died, 1975. Terry A. Anderson, the last and longest-held American hostage in Lebanon, was released, 1991. Wednesday 5th December - Cicero delivered the fourth Catiline Oration, 63 BCE. Chinese Emperor Zhu Wen born, 852. Ealhswith, queen consort of Alfred the Great, King of Wessex, died, 902. Christopher Columbus became the first European to set foot on Hispaniola, present-day Haiti and the Dominican Republic, 1492. Martin Van Buren, 8th President of the United States, born, 1782. Composer Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart died, 1791. The Great Smog descended on London, 1952. Engineer Robert Watson-Watt, inventor of radar, died, 1973. Actress Amy Acker born, 1976. Thursday 6th December - Spanish settlers founded Quito, Ecuador, 1534. Physicist and astronomer Niccolò Zucchi born, 1586. Scottish songwriter and poet Lady Grizel Baillie died, 1746. The first edition of the Washington Post was published, 1877. Writer Anthony Trollope died, 1882. Occultist Dion Fortune born, 1890. Vladimir Nabokov finished writing Lolita, 1953. Actress Janet Munro died, 1972. Cricketer and broadcaster Andrew "Freddie" Flintoff born, 1977.
This week, Anthony Trollope:What on Earth could be more luxurious than a sofa, a book and a cup of coffee?
A selection of quotations from films with a common actor or actress. Answers next issue or from the regular address.Last issue's quotations were from films starring Steve Guttenberg:
- Three wishes I'll grant ye, great wishes an' small! But you wish a fourth and you'll lose them all!
- - What did I tell you? Anything we need, the island will produce it for us, even a girl.
- A girl. But we have three sons.- They've shifted the tilt of the earth. The stupid, crazy, irresponsible bastards! They've finally done it.
- - Cute little things, aren't they?
- I'm gonna throw a bomb at that one. You watch on the screen, see what happens.- - Generally speaking I consider my private life to be my own concern.
- Well, yes - of course it is. But then again of course it isn't.
- That's not a baby, that's a Mr. Potato Head!
-- Amazon Women on the Moon [1987]- Now, I thought it would be nice if we were to close out our first afternoon together with a nice little stroll around the campus. MOVE OUT, MAGGOTS!
-- Police Academy [1984]- I am standing here beside myself.
-- Short Circuit [1986]- - Have you any idea how many men in their mid-60s die every day?
- I try not to think about it.
-- The Boys From Brazil [1978]- Nobody means what they say on Thanksgiving, Mom. You know that. That's what the day's supposed to be all about, right? Torture.
-- Home for the Holidays [1995]
Strange stories from around the world, some of which might be true...
- HISTORY! Archaeologists from the University of Strasbourg have unearthed an untouched ancient Egyptian tomb in the Assasseef valley near Luxor, that is thought to be over 3,500 years old. The tomb contains two painted sarcophagi, each holding a mummy, and around 1,000 funerary statues, with everything in perfect condition. The identities of the tomb's occupants have not been determined, but the tomb probably dates from the 18th Dynasty, 1550 BCE to around 1300 BCE. ● The Leaning Tower of Pisa is "stable and slowly reducing its lean" according to the Surveillance Group that monitor it. In 1990 its lean was 4.5m (177") off the vertical and it was closed amid fears that it might topple. A number of measures were deployed to counter the lean, including weighting the raised half of its base and strapping it to stop it from cracking. Between 1993 and 2001 the 57m (186') tower's tilt was corrected by 45cm (18") and over the last 20 years by an additional 4cm (1.5"). ● A Pembrokeshire metal detectorist has found what could be the first Celtic chariot burial discovered in Wales. In February his target field was flooded so he switched to another and found what he thought was a Celtic brooch, but an expert contact suggested it was part of a horse harness dating from around 600 BCE, after which the detectorist dug down further and found red enammelled pieces. "I knew the importance of them straight away. [..] finding this has been a privilege" Mike Smith told reporters. The location of the chariot is being kept secret until archaeologists can excavate it fully next year.
- NATURE! California Highway Patrol officers staffing the Donner Pass division's commercial vehicle enforcement facility in Truckee earlier this month had an unusual visitor, as a bear approached the door, stood up, opened the door and sauntered in before dropping down to all fours, wandering past vending machines then strolling back out, followed by two curious officers, all caught on security cameras. Six days later the department tweeted that "Our bear friend made a return visit", although this time he just wandered around the car park. At this time of year bears are preparing for hibernation and spend up to 20 hours a day foraging for food. ● A brown and white husky dog called Sinatra went missing from Brooklyn, New York City, 18 months ago. He has now reappeared more than 1,100 miles (1,770km) away in Florida, where a 9-year-old girl found him as a stray. A vet checked his identification chip but could only retrieve the name "Willis Lee" and a partial phone number. A friend of the girl's family turned to social media and managed to track down Sinatra's family, to whom he is being returned. Sinatra had originally been a present for Lesmore Willis' 14-year-old daughter, and disappeared a year after she died in a gun accident at a friend's house, so his return is particularly special to the Willis family. ● Unicorns do not exist, but their origins may lie in a real creature, that is now thought to have existed until at least 39,000 years ago, when early humans shared the planet. It was not a horse though, but a 4-tonne (4.4 ton) hairy rhinoceros, Elasmotherium sibericum, with a large single horn on its nose. It had been thought that the rhino, dubbed the Siberian Unicorn, had died out at least 100,000 years ago but radiocarbon-dating of 23 specimens pushed its survival forward to 39,000 years, and DNA analysis shows that it split from modern rhinos about 40 million years ago. Another, more likely, contender for the origin of the unicorn myth is the still-present tusked narwhal, whose tusks were oftern displayed as coming from unicorns.
- SCIENCE! Bad news for those who sweltered uncomfortably in this summer's heat. The UK Climate Projections 2018, the first significant update on climate change in Britain for 10 years, has warned that if CO2 emissions continue to increase summer temperatures could be 5.4oC (9.72oF) hotter by 2070. If emissions are curtailed the temperature rise will be reduced by more than half, although the chance of summers as hot as this years' will still be 50% (up from the previous forecast of 10%). It is not just summers that will be effected though; winters will be warmer, but signifcicantly wetter, seeing up to 35% more rainfall in the worst case scenario, linking with a forecast by the UK Comittee on Climate Change that up to 1.2 million homes could be at increased risk of flooding by 2080. A warmer climate will also see water levels rising, by up to 1.15m (43") in London. ● A cloud of dark matter may be heading towards the Earth; in fact it may already be here. In 2017 astronomers saw a line of stars, probably from another, merged, galaxy moving through the Milky Way close to the Solar System. It is postulated that they might be accompanied by a cloud of dark matter from the original dwarf galaxy. Dark matter is hard to detect, mostly because nobody knows exactly what it is, but a number of experiments designed to detect what it might be are coming on-stream. ● Chinese researcher He Jiankui of Shenzhen has announced the birth of twin girls, the first people to be born with modified DNA, in this case to make them resistant to HIV, the Aids virus. The announcement - and a second than another genetically modified child is still in utero - were met with howls of condemnation from ethicists and scientists around the world who deemed it unconscionable and indefencible to genetically alter humans before birth. He provided no independent confirmation of his work, which has now been halted in the wake of the protests.
- PEOPLE! A small cargo plane flew almost 30 miles (50km) past its destination in Australia after the pilot - and sole crew - fell asleep in the cockpit. The Australian Transport Safety Bureau are investigating the "incapacitation" incident and will interview the pilot before releasing their report next year. ● Frenchman Ben Lecomte, 51, has been forced to abandon his attempt to become the first person to swim across the Pacific Ocean after more than 1,500 nautical miles (2,700km), about a third of the distance, after his support boat suffered "irreparable damage" to a sail. He had already encountered typhoons, ocean swells and the "Great Pacific Garbage Patch", the gyre in the north Pacific where mostly-plastic waste accumulates. ● A Home Office investigation is underway into how an adult asylum seeker was able to pose as a 15-year-old and attend Stoke High School in Ipswich. Pupils at the school raised their concerns with staff after noting the man's appearance - 6'1" (1.85m) in height with a full beard. Pupils put his name into Facebook and found that he had been a University student before leaving Iran for Germany, and saw pictures of him drinking beer and with an hairy chest. "It's like someone's dad came into school," a Year 11 boy told reporters. The man, who was able to spend six weeks at the school after telling officials that he was a teenager, faces deportation.
- CRIME! a woman has been jailed in Ireland for causing criminal damage to a €1.50 (£1.30; $1.66) tube of Pringles crisps. The woman, already banned from a Tesco supermarket in Cork, Ireland, went there regardless and was heading for the self-checkouts when security guards spotted her. She opened the tube to try to force them to let her buy it. The judge, noting that she already had a string of convictions for theft and criminal damage, imposed a four-month prison sentence with two months suspended, saying that it was difficult to see her actions as anything but "smart Alec behaviour." ● A man arrested for allegedly threatening to blow up a Willie's Chicken Shack restaurant in New Orleans during an argument with staff has defended himself by saying he was referring to a 'bowel movement'. Arthur Posey, 30, allegedly approached the food preparation area and asked what time the restaurant closed, then said "Y'all about to close right now because I'm going to get a bomb and blow this place up." Posey claims that he actually said he was going "going to blow the bathroom up" in reference to a bowel movement, although staff do not recall any mention of the bathroom. Posey is scheduled for a mental competency hearing as this issue goes out. ● South Koreans are paying to be sent to jail for 24 hours. "The Prison Inside Me" is not an actual criminal jail, but rather a getaway for people stressed by modern life, with a total ban on communications, including mobile phones, no mirrors or clocks and lots of silence. Residents, who pay £70 ($90) for 24-hours solitary confinement, wear prison jumpsuits and are given a 5m2 (54 sq. ft) 'cell' with a diary, yoga mat and panic button, but if solitary confinement is not for them there are also a number of group spiritual activities available. Their meals are served through a hatch in the cell door. More than 2000 people have stayed in the 'prison' since it opened in 2013.
IN BRIEF: Last year Camborne in Cornwall had a fake Christmas tree dubbed "the worst in Britain"; the cone-shaped construction was vandalised more than 10 times. This year they have gone for a more traditional 7.6m (25') Spruce. ● Hundreds of couples have taken part in Bankok's annual 'Running of The Brides' event, comparable to wife-carrying races elsewhere, but with the prize of a lavish wedding and honeymoon. ● Brentford Football Club were temporarily reduced to a 10-man team during a match against Middlesborough last week, not because of a red card, but because full-back Moses Odubajo was taken short and had to leave the pitch for a toilet break. Middlesborough won 2-1. ● The Chinese city of Zhangye has been hit by a sandstorm with a wall of sand almost 100m (328') high. ● Man survives being bitten on the head and neck by a shark while diving in the Bahamas. ● The Notting Hill Bookshop, used as The Travel Book Co. in Richard Curtis' Notting Hill inundated with requests from fans wanting to propose in the shop ahead of 20th anniversary of film. ● Largest cast bronze sculpture in UK to be erected outside Plymouth Theatre Royal - at 7m (23'); currently being cast in sections before assembly. ● Thomas Cook finally corrects misleading Christmas travel claim that Lapland city of Rovaniemi ("The Official Home of Santa Claus") is "far inside the Arctic Circle, where the snow is thick and sparkling". Rovaniemi is actually five miles outside the Arctic Circle. ● Beach clean-up in Cornwall finds plastic crisp and nut packets bearing best before dates in 1984, making them 34 years old. ● UK Parliament's Digital, Culture, Media and Sports Committee hearing into 'fake news' with international partners have empty seat with 'Mark Zuckerberg' nameplate on witness desk to highlight Facebook founder's repeated refusals to attend. ● Australia's largest cow, a 194cm- (76")-tall, 1.4 tonne (1.5 ton) steer called Knickers has been saved from the abattoir because he is too big to transport, and will live out his days in a cattle paddock.
TRUMPWATCH. Ivanka Trump claims "Lock her up!" protest does not apply to her over her use of a private email server for government business. ● Donald Trump refers to himself in tweet as 'President T' (actually the stage name of a London grime musician) - Twitterati ponder whether that's 'T' for 'toupee' or 'tiny hands' and produces rather scary mash-up of Trump's face and Mr T.'s head. ● After Trump dismisses US government report on climate change drawn up from peer-reviewed science and asks "Whatever happened to Global Warming?" after "coldest weather in the history of the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade in NYC" meteorologist points out that "climate isn't a day, climate is long-term" and that rest of US and most of the world was above average temperatures that day. ● Trump supporter Kanye West, or Ye, "doesn't know about the politics", according to his wife. ● Group of rogue Wikipedia editors repeatedly replaced photographs of Trump on his Wikipedia entry with pictures of penises. ● After someone in the White House finally got it through to Trump that he cannot use executive orders to shut down media outlets that criticise him, he tweeted a suggestion for a government-funded TV network to promote himself and his constant stream of thought-lacking babble (yes, there is the government-funded Voice of America, but their director has insisted that they would not be "manipulated by the Trump administration.").
Avengers: Infinity War tie-in book reveals Dr Erik Selvig and Darcy Lewis survived end of film; fan speculation that Selvig will be key to resolution of story in Avengers 4, or perhaps it will be Howard the Duck that saves the universe... ● Berwick Kaler retiring as Britain's longest serving pantomime dame after 41 years at York Theatre Royal. ● Blizzard reportedly working on Pokémon Go inspired (but with both single- and multi-player modes) Warcraft-themed mobile game after poor reception for Diablo Immortal. ● Bob Dylan, Neil Young to jointly headline 2019 Hyde Park festival. ● Rita Ora missed lip-sync cue while singing in Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade. ● 1963 sketch Dinner for One starring music hall star Freddie Frinton gets first airing in Britain, having become staple of New Year's Day TV in Germany since 1972. ● Jose Carreras to play final London concert next summer. ● Michael Buble shuts down retirement talk, as album hits #1 spot in UK. ● Tears for Fears, The Jacksons added to 2019 Hampton Court Palace Festival roster. ● David Walliams' Billionaire Boy being adapted for stage musical. ● The Justice League spin-off Aquaman gets London premiere, critical reactions generally good. ● Survey of 2,201 US adults finds 73% want to see another Back to the Future film; original cast unlikely to return if it happens for health/age reasons. ● 2000AD owner Rebellion converting old Didcot newspaper factory into six-soundstage film studio complex, developing Rogue Trooper film directed by Duncan Jones and Judge Dredd TV series (cast, broadcaster tba). ● Bruised vocal cords force Justin Timberlake to postpone Los Angeles show. ● Katy Perry, Taylor Swift, Beyoncé, Pink, Lady Gaga top Forbes' annual list of highest earning women in music business. ● Tim Allen reveals Keanu Reeves is in Toy Story 4 cast, does not name character. ● Les Dennis forced to deny being behind a number of "Les Dennis" graffiti tags that appeared in Norwich. ● Square Enix forced to pull Kingdom Hearts Union X, Mobius Final Fantasy and Dissidia Final Fantasy Opera Omnia from sale in Belgium over "uncertain legal status" of in-game loot boxes. ● Marvel to release 11-volume slipcase of prime Avengers comics ahead of Avengers 4 release. ● Disney release two tracks from Mary Poppins Returns. ● Britain's National Videogame Museum reopens after moving from Nottingham to Sheffield. ● Netflix signs deal with Roald Dahl estate to create 'story universe' with new animated adaptations including Matilda and The Twits. ● CBS developing continuation of Northern Exposure with creators Joshua Brand, John Falsey, starting from Dr Joel Fleischman (Rob Morrow) returning to Alaska for a funeral. ● Red Dead Online beta version goes live. ● Rita Moreno returning to West Side Story, will exec. produce, star as owner of corner shop ('Doc' in original). ● Newly-released game cartridge design patent hints that Sony are working on follow-up to PS Vita. ● Trailer for live action/CG The Lion King breaks record for most-watched Disney trailer in a day, becomes second most-viewed trailer from any studio in 24 hours. ● Sony confirms that some games are playing slower on US Playstation Classic consoles because they were based on 50Hz PAL versions, rather than 60Hz NTSC. ● Tom Baker's unfilmed Doctor Who movie script Scratchman, written with co-star Ian Marter, being released as a novel. ● Venom's global box office takings pass Wonder Woman's and Spider-Man's despite mixed reviews. ● Magic Radio to play nothing but Christmas songs from 09:00 Friday.
Anti-gun student activist Sandra Parks (killed by stray bullet, 13), singer Devin Lima (LFO, 41), activist and radio host Raed Fares (Syria's Radio Fresh, frequently defied IS with humour, 46), animator Stephen Hillenburg (Rocko's Modern Life, SpongeBob SquarePants, 57), magician and actor Ricky Jay (Magnolia, Tomorrow Never Dies, Boogie Nights, 70), filmmaker Bernardo Bertolucci (1900, Last Tango in Paris, The Last Emperor, 77), filmmaker Nicolas Roeg (Walkabout, The Man Who Fell to Earth, Don't Look Now, 90), physicist Riccardo Levi-Setti (developer of the scanning ion microscope, 91), WWII veteran, author and social activist Harry Leslie Smith ("the world's oldest rebel", 95), politician Jean Barker, Baroness Trumpington (former Bletchley Park code transcriber, famously flicked the V-sign at a fellow peer during a debate in the Lords, 96).
^ DUMBLEDORE BEAR'S LOTTERY PREDICTOR!
Dumbledore Bear, our in-house psychic predicts that the following numbers will be lucky:5, 10, 21, 24, 31, 41[UK National Lottery, number range 1-59]
You can get your very own prediction at http://www.simonlamont.co.uk/tfir/dumbledore.htm.
Little Jennifer came home from school one day and, pouting, handed her mother a letter. Her mother read it, looked at her daughter and said, "This says you were sent to the headmaster's office for swearing in class, Little Jennifer. Would you like to explain?"
"I was arguing with Little Mary and I said the 'b' word, Mummy. Miss sent me to the headmaster."
Her mother sighed. "Well that wasn't very bright."
Little Jennifer smiled as only she could. "No, Mummy, it wasn't 'bright', it was 'bugger'!"
^ ...end of line