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Issue #512 - 1st February 2019
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| Contents | — – o o O o o – — |
^ WORD OF THE WEEK
spectrophobia |
Friday 1st February - The coronation of Edward III of England, 1327. Lexicographer & historian Johannes Trithemius born, 1462. Menas, Emperor of Ethiopia, died, 1563. France declared war on the United Kingdom and the Netherlands in the French Revolutionary Wars, 1793. Writer Mary Shelley, creator of Frankenstein, died, 1851. Singer Clara Butt born, 1872. Four black students staged the first of the Greensboro sit-ins in Greensboro, North Carolina, 1960. Actress Hildegard Knef died, 2002. Welsh rugby union player Gavin Henson born, 1982. Saturday 2nd February - Byzantine emperor Justin I born, 450. Stephen, King of England, was defeated and captured at the Battle of Lincoln, 1141. Joanna II of Naples died, 1435. Hamnet, son of William Shakespeare, born, 1585. New Amsterdam, now New York City, was incorporated, 1653. Mathematician Robert Smith died, 1768. Actress Farrah Fawcett born, 1947. Nine experienced ski hikers in the Ural Mountains died in mysterious circumstances, 1959. Singer & bassist Sid Vicious died, 1979. Groundhog Day in the United States & Canada. Marmot Day in Alaska. World Wetlands Day. Sunday 3rd February - Johannes Gutenberg, inventor of the movable-type printing press, died, 1468. The colony of Massachusetts issued the first paper currency in America, 1690. Samuel Osgood, first U.S. Postmaster General, born, 1747. The Fifteenth Amendment to the United States Constitution, guaranteeing voting rights to all male citizens regardless of "race, colour or previous condition of servitude", was ratified, 1870. Writer Gertrude Stein born, 1874. Singer-songwriter Buddy Holly died, 1959. Actor, writer & producer Warwick Davis born, 1970. Physicist Frank Oppenheimer died, 1985. Astronaut Eileen Collins became the first woman to pilot the Space Shuttle, aboard Discovery on mission STS-63, 1995. Monday 4th February - Roman emperor Septimus Severus died, 211. A major earthquake struck the eastern coast of Sicily, 1169. Poet Lodovico Lazzarelli born, 1447. The U.S. Electoral College unanimously elected George Washington as the first President of the United States, 1789. Actor Nigel Bruce born, 1895. Nobel laureate physicist Hendrik Lorentz died, 1928. The Yalta Conference between Churchill, Roosevelt & Stalin opened, during World War II, 1945. Jenny Shipley, 36th Prime Minister of New Zealand, born, 1952. Florence Green, last known surviving veteran of World War I, died, 2012. Rosa Parks Day in California and Missouri. World Cancer Day. Tuesday 5th February - Artist Giovanni Battista Moroni died, 1578. Composer Biagio Marini born, 1594. The Scottish Parliament declared Charles Stuart, son of King Charles I, King Charles II of England and Scotland, 1649. Robert Peel, Prime Minister of the United Kingdom and creator of the modern police, born, 1788. Physician William Cullen died, 1790. The Hermitage Museum in Saint Petersburg, Russia, opened to the public, 1852. Philosopher & historian Thomas Carlyle died, 1881. The Royal Greenwich Observatory began broadcasting the Greenwich Time Signal, 1924. Actress Jennifer Jason Leigh born, 1962. Wednesday 6th February - Queen Anne of Great Britain born, 1665. James II of England and VII of Scotland acceded to the throne, 1685. Philosopher Adam Weishaupt, founder of the Illuminati, born, 1748. Gardener & architect Lancelot "Capability" Brown died, 1783. Otto became the first modern King of Greece, 1833. Isabella Beeton, author of Mrs Beeton's Book of Household Management, died, 1865. Singer-songwriter Natalie Cole born, 1950. Jack Kilby filed the first patent for an integrated circuit, 1959. Comic book writer & artist Jack Kirby died, 1994. Waitangi Day in New Zealand. Thursday 7th February - Thomas More, Lord Chancellor of the United Kingdom, born, 1478. The Bonfire of the Vanities took place, 1497. Sculptor Bartolommeo Bandinelli died, 1560. Writer Charles Dickens born, 1812. Artist Boris Grigoriev died, 1939. Walt Disney's Pinocchio premiered, 1940. Actress Tina Majorino born, 1985. Crown prince Abdulla acceded to the throne of Jordan as King Abdullah II, 1999. Magician & politician Doug Henning died, 2000.
This week, Thomas Carlyle:The true University of these days is a collection of books.
A selection of quotations from films with a common actor or actress. Answers next issue or from the regular address.Last issue's quotations were from films starring Emma Thompson:
- Never drum on a white lady's boobies at a big redneck dance. Got it.
- If I had known I was gonna meet the president, I would've worn a tie. I mean, look at me. I look like a schlemiel.
- That is just a whole lot of pretty in a whole lot of crazy.
- Put up your arms and all your flippers.
- Life is not the amount of breaths you take, it's the moments that take your breath away.
- I am Colin. God of Sex. I'm just on the wrong continent, that's all.
-- Love Actually [2003]- - You know, George, I've always felt our futures lay outside the world of academic achievement.
- Fred, I've been thinking exactly the same thing.
-- Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix [2007]- You are the wildest, most gorgeous thing I've ever seen! Nobody deserves you...
-- Beauty and the Beast [2017]- Can't go back and keep making same mistakes. Must keep moving forward and make new ones.
-- Bridget Jones's Baby [2016]- I had rather hear my dog bark at a crow than a man swear he loves me.
-- Much Ado About Nothing [1993]
Strange stories from around the world, some of which might be true...
- HISTORY! Archaeologists working at a building site near Euston Station, London, have found the long-lost grave of Captain Matthew Flinders, who led the first expedition to sail around Australia in 1803, and who is generally credited with naming the continent in his book A Voyage to Terra Australis. Flinders was thought to have been buried in the cemetary after he died in 1814, but part of the graveyard was built over for Euston Station and the adjoining St James Gardens park, with headstones and grave markers removed. Development of the HS2 high-speed train link has caused the excavation in the Gardens, where a number of coffin plates were found. Most were made of tin and had been worn away by the damp London soil, but Flinders' was made of lead and was still clearly legible. ● Jonny Woods, a third-year divinity undergraduate at the University of St Andrews, has deciphered a shorthand code that has baffled researchers since its creator, Andrew Fuller, a Baptist minister with an international reputation, died in 1815. Fuller left hundreds of pages of notes on his sermons written in the code and nobody had been able to decipher them. Dr Steve Holmes, head of St Andrews University's School of Divinity found a shorthand text by Fuller headed in longhand and wondered if it might match a plaintext copy of the same text printed in a biography. He recruited Woods as a research assistant and a few weeks later the code was cracked and the sermons, dating from 1782, are being translated. ● Last week three watercolour paintings, described as being of "no artistic value" were put up for auction in Berlin. Strong demand for them was expected because the artist was the yet-to-be Nazi leader Adolf Hitler, who was an unsuccessful artist before he turned to politics. Within 24 hours, however, German police had seized the paintings and opened an enquiry into "attempted fraud" and "falsification of documents" with the suspicion that both the paintings and their provenance documentation had been faked.
- NATURE! In 2009 Alex Elliott's beloved cat Lilly disappeared for the second time - having previously wandered off for two weeks - and despite her family putting up posters there was no trace of her, leaving them to presume that she had been run over by a car. Recently a neighbour gave his cat to the RSPCA as he could no longer care for her, and they took it to a vet who scanned the cat for a microchip. The cat was Lilly. The man, who lived just 400 yards (366m) from Alex had taken in what he thought was a stray and kept her as a house cat. Alex told reporters "I was crying my eyes out when I saw her again, I just gave her a big cuddle." Lilly, now 15, has bonded with Alex's other cats and family, including her daughter who was born years after Lilly disappeared, and had only known of her through photographs. ● Three-year-old Casey Hathaway was playing in his grandmother's back garden in Ernul, North Carolina, when he wandered off and went missing in freezing temperatures and weather conditions so bad that a search had to be called off. Three days later rescuers responding to reports of a child crying found him, cold and soaking wet, with a few scrapes but otherwise unharmed, tangled up in bushes. Casey said that he had been protected by a friendly bear which had stayed with him for the two nights and days. ● Wiltshire Wildlife Hospital near Salisbury is used to receiving stray animals, but something rather unusual was brought in last week - a white skunk tht had been found near stables in west Wiltshire. Marilyn Korkis, a staff member at the hospital, told reporters that they had initially been contacted by a vet who was unsure what it was, and photographs did not help them identify it, but the animal was ill so they took it in, at which point someone realised that it was a leucistic (lacking in pigment) skunk, normally native to the Americas, and had caught a chill. A few hours later the hospital received a frantic phone call from the skunk's owner, who collected it straight away and took it to her vet. Throughout its ordeal the skunk did not spray, much to everyone's relief, no doubt.
- SCIENCE! Earth's oldest rock sample has been identified - and it comes from the Moon. An analysis of a rock sample brought back by the Apollo 14 astronauts has found that it contains quartz, feldspar and zircon, all common on Earth, but not generally present on the Moon. The rock formed at Earth-like temperatures and crystallised between 4bn and 4.1bn years ago when the planet was forming, about 12.4 miles (20km) below the surface. The rock was probably ejected from the Earth after a collison with an asteroid, buried under the lunar surface until another impact brought it back up to be discovered by the astronauts. ● Scientists at MIT have used lasers to beam sound directly into a human ear, using the "optoacoustic effect" produced by the interaction of light and water in the air. The signal can be detected at about 60 decibels 2.5m (8') from the transmitter and should work even in fairly dry conditions because "there is almost always a little water in the air, especially around people." ● UK scientists have successfully drilled a hole 2km (1.2 miles) to the base of the West Antarctic Ice Sheet and deployed instruments at the bottom which will measure the speed of movement at the ice stream's base, allowing for more accurate models of future ice melting in the Antarctic.
- PEOPLE! Before he died, aged 68, last year, Ashbourn, Derbyshire, resident Mick Finnikin told his friends that he wanted his ashes used in a firework display. Carolyn Brown has spent almost a year organising the display, but Derbyshire Dales Council has rejected her request for a licence to hold the event at Ashbourne Recreation Ground after concerns were raised by Ashbourne Town Council and local District Council members that Finnikin's ashes might land in people's gardens. Brown is now looking for a more remote location to hold the display. ● Utah resident David Matheson was a prominent "gay conversion therapist" who created a course which claimed it could change the sexuality of its homosexual and bisexual students to heterosexuality, despite being utterly discredited by the medical and psychiatric professions. Matheson, a practicing Mormon, has now told the LGBTQ nonprofit group Truth Wins Out on Sunday that he has "embarked on a new life-giving path that has already started a whole new growth process." He has come out as gay and is divorcing his wife of 34 years. ● Twenty-year-old beautician Abigail Thompson of Keighley, West Yorkshire was sitting on her sofa when she suffered a bad sneezing fit that included a sharp feeling in her nose. She looked in the tissue she had used and saw something unexpected - a metal ring she had been given for her eighth birthday but lost a few months later, and assumed that one of her friends had stolen it. Her mother, who had given her the ring, was utterly amazed to hear of its return. Abigail suspects that it must have got stuck while she was picking her nose as a child, and as she grew up the cavity holding the ring grew bigger until it came back out.
- CRIME! Many cities have schemes where you can hire a bicycle or - in the case of Austin, Texas, an electric foot scooter. Earlier this week 19-year-old Luca Mangiarano was charged with robbery by threat after demanding money from a teller at a BBVA Compass bank branch. His crime was foiled because he made his getaway on an Uber Jump scooter. Police were able to trace his hiring of the scooter via CCTV and obtained his name, address and credit card number from Uber, better known for its taxi-hailing service. The police found the scooter outside Mangiarano's apartment, and confirmed that he was in the area of the bank at the time of the crime through cellphone tracking data. ● James Longden, 30, from Chester, was recently jailed for two years for theft after breaking into a neighbour's house. The victim, looking to replace his lost items, was searching on auction site eBay when he saw a watch and leather jacket exactly like his, being sold by the same vendor. He placed successful bids and arranged to meet the seller in person to pay for them in cash. Instead of the victim, though, London turned up with the stolen items to be met by police officers who arrested him, and then found most of the other stolen goods in his home. ● Traffic police in Norfolk were "shocked" when they stopped an erratically-driven car on the A11 near Wymondham as they realised that it was missing the front right-hand tyre and being driven on the hub. The driver was given a breathalyser test and found to be more than three times over the drink-driving limit. One Twitter wag commented that "[I] think it is below 1.6mm", the minimum legal tyre tread depth.
IN BRIEF: Museum of Classic Sci-Fi in Allendale, Northumberland, ordered to remove a shed housing a replica Dalek because the structure does not fit with the Grade II listed building housing the museum. ● Australian woman sitting on toilet bitten on bum by non-venomous carpet python. ● First England's Gatwick and Heathrow airports, now Newark Liberty International Airport in New Jersey, USA, brought to standstill by drones sighting. ● Florida man fishing with magnet pulls up WWII grenade, tosses it into his car's trunk then heads to a Taco Bell to call police; bomb squad remove device without incident. ● DeepMind's AlphaStar defeats top human players at real-time strategy computer game StarCraft II. ● Lake ice across Northern Hemisphere thinning as a result of climate change, threatening skaters. ● McDonald's caught serving chicken nuggets in supposedly meat-free spicy veggie wraps. ● Craft gin boom means there are now more distilleries in England than in Scotland for the first time. ● SCUBA divers can now undergo decompression underwater in submersible "tent". ● One in 20 people in Britain do not believe the Holocaust took place. ● Customer claims to have found "human bone" in Primark sock; investigation underway. ● Australian researchers study Game of Thrones TV series to figure out which characters are most likely to survive to the end of the final season. ● South Sudan given its own Internet top-level domain, eyebrows raised at prospect of '.ss' sites. ● Toronto airport sniffer dog finds 5,000 live leeches in luggage of man returning from Russia.
WEATHER WATCH: With Australia currently experiencing a heatwave a pub in Adelaide promised to give out free beer if the temperature rose above 45oC (113oF); when it rose to an 80-year record of 46.2oC (115.16oF) the owner kept to his promise. ● Millon Rugby League Football Club recently played host to the newly-created Serbian team Red Star Belgrade team, and the Cumbrian weather made sure the match was memorable. The Serbians kicked off into a headwind strong enough to push the ball backwards, resulting in a penalty kick for Millon from the halfway line. With a following wind the ball sailed between the posts 50 yards (45.7m) away. ● As temperatures across Britain dropped curlers at Glenesk Curling Club in Angus were able to use the outdoor pond to play matches for the first time in five years. ● Connecticutt resident Rodley Russo, 75, was killed when his car, parked on his sloping driveway, slid backwards into him as he was retrieving something from the trunk. ● Police departments in Illinois advise potential criminals to "stay inside and read, watch Netflix, go on the FBI Bank Robbers website and help catch other criminals, anything, but for the love of polar bears, do not go outside and commit crimes" in the sub-zero weather. ● The overhyped Internet-of-Things by which you can (theoretically) control your home through apps has suffered an embarassing failure as the Nest app and website, used to control home heating systems, went down as temperatures in the US were set to plunge to record low levels, caused by a 'polar vortex' of cold air that could bring wind chill temperatures down to -53oC (-64oF), lower than parts of Antarctica. ● Needless to say, the US President still cannot tell the difference between weather and climate, tweeting for global warming to come back...
Bodyguard producer hints that Richard Madden is in running to play James Bond. ● Musical based on Alanis Morissette's Jagged Little Pill album heading to Broadway after Cambridge, MA, debut. ● Apple reportedly developing subscription-based streaming video service to rival Netflix, Amazon. ● Ariana Grande's "7 Rings" sets new record for most streamed track in a single week. ● Banksy mural painted on emergency exit door of Bataclan music hall, Paris, in tribute to victims of 2015 attack cut out of door, stolen. ● Former gymnast Beth Tweddle suing makers of The Jump over 2016 injuries. ● Epic Games facing fourth lawsuit for stealing dance moves for Fortnite. ● Bohemian Rhapsody dropped from GLAAD award nominations over sexual abuse allegations against director Bryan Singer. ● R. Kelly, already facing numerous sexual abuse allegations now also hit with 66 building code violations on his recording studio, including using it as a residence. ● Chemical Brothers to headline Creamfields festival, August. ● Pink to receive star on Hollywood Walk of Fame. ● Cardi B gets Las Vegas residency. ● Bart van Es wins Costa Book of the Year for The Cut Out Girl. ● Dalia Stasevska becomes first female conductor of BBC Symphony Orchestra. ● E.L. James announces first book since 50 Shades series, The Mister. ● Epic Games to make Fortnite llama loot boxes 'transparant', revealing contents before gamers pay for them. ● Movie in development based on Funko Pop figurines could be first Marvel/DC cinematic crossover. ● Grammys issue statement giving "no legitimacy" to 'leaked' winners list. ● Home recording of David Bowie's first television performance as Ziggy Stardust - on ITV's Lift Off with Ayshea, July 1972 - comes to light, being restored for inclusion in BBC documentary. ● John Malkovich to star in Bitter Wheat play inspired by Harvey Weinstein scandal, premiering in London's West End, June. ● Kingdom Hearts 3 game to be released without ending; will download epilogue automatically once completed. ● Lana Del Ray, Sigrid, George Ezra, Snow Patrol to headline Latitude Festival, July. ● Man Group hedge fund drops sponsorship of Booker Prize after 18 years. ● Netflix developing Resident Evil TV series, reportedly with same company that is trying to reboot film franchise. ● Mother of murdered toddler James Bulger calls for short drama film based on interrogation of boy killers Robert Thompson, Jon Venables, to be withdrawn from Academy Award contention. ● Director Patty Jenkins hints that third Wonder Woman film could move action to present day. ● Film editor Thelma Schoonmaker (Raging Bull, Goodfellas &c) to receive BAFTA Fellowship. ● Calls for Eurovision Song Contest to be moved out of Israel over human rights concerns. ● Peter Jackson to make documentary feature on The Beatles' Let It Be recording sessions using unreleased footage, restore & re-release earlier Let It Be documentary film. ● Annual Childwise report into UK children's viewing habits finds that majority watched via mobile devices rather than television, Youtube is dominant website, Facebook is falling out of favour, and Friends is the most popular programme, despite having ended in 2004 and containing material that would not be broadcast today. ● The video games industry made nearly four times as much money last year as the top 100 films.
Screen Actors' Guild (SAG) Awards: Outstanding Performance by a Male Actor in a Leading Role: Rami Malek, Bohemian Rhapsody; Outstanding Performance by a Female Actor in a Leading Role: Glenn Close, The Wife; Outstanding Performance by a Male Actor in a Supporting Role: Mahershala Ali, Green Book; Outstanding Performance by a Female Actor in a Supporting Role: Emily Blunt, A Quiet Place; Outstanding Performance by a Cast in a Motion Picture: Black Panther; Outstanding Performance by a Male Actor in a Television Movie or Miniseries: Darren Criss, American Crime Story: The Assassination of Gianni Versace; Outstanding Performance by a Female Actor in a Television Movie or Miniseries: Patricia Arquette, Escape at Dannemora; Outstanding Performance by a Male Actor in a Drama Series: Jason Bateman, Ozark; Outstanding Performance by a Female Actor in a Drama Series: Sandra Oh, Killing Eve; Outstanding Performance by a Male Actor in a Comedy Series: Tony Shalhoub, The Marvelous Mrs Maisel; Outstanding Performance by a Female Actor in a Comedy Series: Rachel Brosnahan, The Marvelous Mrs Maisel; Outstanding Performance by an Ensemble in a Drama Series: This Is Us; Outstanding Performance by an Ensemble in a Comedy Series: The Marvelous Mrs Maisel; Outstanding Action Performance by a Stunt Ensemble in a Comedy or Drama Series: Glow; Outstanding Action Performance by a Stunt Ensemble in a Motion Picture: Black Panther.
London Critics' Circle Theatre Awards: Jack Tinker Award for Most Promising Newcomer: Chris Walley, The Lieutenant of Inishmore, Noël Coward Theatre; Trewin Award for Best Shakespearean Performance: Sophie Okonedo, Antony & Cleopatra, National Theatre; Most Promising Playwright: Natasha Gordon, Nine Night, National Theatre & Trafalgar Studios; Peter Hepple Award for Best Musical: Company, Gielgud Theatre; Best Designer: Bunny Christie, Company, Gielgud Theatre; Best Director: Stephen Daldry, The Inheritance, Young Vic & Noël Coward Theatre; Best Actress: Patsy Ferran, Summer & Smoke, Almeida Theatre & Duke of York's Theatre; Best Actor: Kyle Soller, The Inheritance, Young Vic & Noël Coward Theatre; Best New Play: The Ineritance, Young Vic & Noël Coward Theatre; Special Award: Neil McPherson, Artistic Director of the Finborough Theatre.
Comedian & sitcom writer Kevin Barnett (Rel, Broad City, 32), singer James Ingram ("Baby, Come to me", "Yah Mo B There", twice Oscar nominee, 66), sports journalist Hugh McIlvanney (The Sunday Times, The Rumble in the Jungle, International Boxing Hall of Fame, 84), acting teacher William Esper (students included Paul Sorvino, Kim Basinger, William Hurt, 86), composer Michel Legrand ("The Windmills of Your Mind", Yentl score, Summer of '42 score, 86), writer & editor Diana Athill (Somewhere Towards the End, Margaret Atwood, VS Naipaul, 101).
^ DUMBLEDORE BEAR'S LOTTERY PREDICTOR!
Dumbledore Bear, our in-house psychic predicts that the following numbers will be lucky:1, 5, 6, 7, 40, 58[UK National Lottery, number range 1-59]
You can get your very own prediction at http://www.simonlamont.co.uk/tfir/dumbledore.htm.
Little Jennifer's class were having an English lesson. "Alright, children," the teacher said, "somebody give me a noun."
Little Simon raised his hand. "Dust, Miss."
"That's right, well done, Little Simon. Now, somebody give me a collective noun."
Little Jennifer thought for a moment then raised her hand. "Vaccuum cleaner, Miss!"
^ ...end of line