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Issue #564 - 15th May 2020
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| Contents | — – o o O o o – — |
^ WORD OF THE WEEK
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Friday 15th May - Roman emperor Valentinian II died, probably assassinated, 392. Astronomer Johannes Kepler confirmed the third law of planetary motion, 1618. Writer L. Frank Baum born, 1856. Mickey Mouse debuted, in Plane Crazy, 1928. Broadcaster Sophie Raworth born, 1968. Singer-songwriter June Carter Cash died, 2003. International Conscientious Objectors Day. Saturday 16th May - Mary, Queen of Scots fled to England, 1568. Mariana of Austria, Queen consort of Spain, died, 1696. Educator Elizabeth Palmer Peabody born, 1804. The first Academy Awards ceremony was held in Hollywood, 1929. Musician Robert Fripp born, 1949. Puppeteer Jim Henson died, 1990. Sunday 17th May - Artist Sandro Botticelli died, 1510. Pirate Bartholomew Roberts born, 1682. The New York Stock Exchange was formed, 1792. Soprano Birgit Nilsson born, 1918. No. 617 Squadron RAF began the Dambuster Raids, 1943. Singer-songwriter Donna Summer died, 2012. Monday 18th May - Poet and astronomer Omar Khayyam born, 1048. An arrest warrant on charges of heresy was issued for playwright Christopher Marlowe, 1593. Antiquarian Elias Ashmole died, 1692. Pilot Ruth Alexander born, 1905. Mount St Helens in Washington State erupted, 1980. Actress Jill Ireland died, 1990. International Museum Day. Tuesday 19th May - Holy Roman Emperor Otto IV died, 1218. Sculptor and architect Baccio D'Agnolo born, 1462. Explorer Jacques Cartier set out on his second voyage to North America, 1535. Soprano Nellie Melba born, 1861. The Soviet Union's Venera 1 space probe passed Venus, becoming the first man-made object to fly by another planet, 1961. Jacqueline Kennedy Onassis, 37th First Lady of the United States, died, 1994. Malcolm X Day in the United States. Wednesday 20th May - Anatomist Hieronymus Fabricius born, 1537. Courtier Isabella Markham died, 1579. William Shakespeare's sonnets were first published, 1609. Singer-songwriter Cher born, 1946. Robert Woodrow Wilson and Arno Penzias discovered the cosmic microwave background radiation, 1964. Actor Jon Pertwee died, 1996. World Bee Day. Thursday 21st May - Engraver Albrecht Dürer born, 1471. King Henry VI of England died, 1471. Writer Daniel Defoe was imprisoned for seditious libel, 1703. Paleontologist Mary Anning born, 1799. Amelia Earhart landed in a Derry field, becoming the first woman to fly solo across the Atlantic, 1932. Singer-songwriter Twinkle died, 2015.
This week, Nellie Melba, in Melodies and Memories [1925]:Music is not written in red, white and blue. It is written in the heart's blood of the composer.
A selection of quotations from films by the same director. Answers next issue or from the regular address.Last issue's quotations were from films directed by Mike Hodges:
- Every time one of these Lancasters fly over, my chickens lay premature eggs.
- I've never seen a face like that before. That must be the look of - of being old.
- It is not the end. It is not the beginning of the end. It is the end of the beginning.
- - One thousand pounds for an elephant? It's outrageous! You've been diddled.
- Undoubtedly. But it's not often one needs an elephant in a hurry.- - Do you think I'm a fool?
- I think most men are fools, white boy. And most women.
- Frank wasn't like that. I'm the villain in the family, remember?
-- Get Carter [1976]- Since the beginning of time, man has looked to the stars and wondered if others like ourselves existed. Would they be super-intelligent, peaceful, sensitive? Our story will go some way to answering these eternal questions.
-- Morons From Outer Space [1985]- - Gambling's not about money... Gambling's about not facing reality, ignoring the odds.
- I must be a fool - I never think about the odds.
-- Croupier [1998]- We have performed this operation successfully on animals 57 times. This will be the first such procedure on a human being.
-- The Terminal Man [1974]- - Look! Water is leaking from her eyes.
- It's what they call tears, it's a sign of their weakness.
-- Flash Gordon [1980]
Strange stories from around the world, some of which might be true...
- A stray peacock from the Franklin Park Zoo in Boston has been recaptured thanks to a policeman and his mobile phone. Snowbank, one of four peacocks who are free to roam the zoo is thought to have strayed out during mating season, going in search of a peahen. A policeman who had been told why Snowbank had probably absconded used his mobile to find a peahen's mating call and lured Snowbank to a fenced-in location where Boston Animal Control could safely capture him and return him to the zoo. ● A security camera in Delhi has caught a monkey vandalising an ATM. The monkey was recorded pulling off a bit of plastic from the machine's front panel, though - perhaps being an honest monkey - it ran off without taking any money.
- The European Space Agency (ESA) has found a solution to one of the problems facing anyone planning to build a base on the moon. A major drawback so far has been the sheer quantity of materials needed to be transported from Earth, but a "lunar concrete" could be made, according to the ESA, using the lunar regolith, the powdery soil that covers the moon's surface, a certain amount of water, either brought from Earth or extracted from ice in shadowed craters, and urea from astronauts' urine. A person typically generates about 3.2 pints (1.5l) of urine a day, which, with a little adjustment to its water content would be ideal for the concrete, although it would reduce the amount of liquid available for recycling systems.
- Someone, apparently, really, really, loves anime (Japanese animation). Since 2012 security flaws in more than 10,000 network video recorders and network-attached storage devices made by D-Link have been exploited by a hacker to create a botnet - a network of systems remotely controlled by a hacker - that sought out and downloaded anime videos. The botnet, called Cereals, was sophisticated enough to block other attempts to take over the devices and was arranged in a group of subnets. Unlike other botnets it did not generate spam or launch distributed denial of service attacks (DDOS, a way of flooding a server with requests to render it inoperable), nor did it try to access private data on the devices. Unfortunately for its author, believed to be a German called Stefan, a combination of security patches by D-Link and a ransomware attack that widely overwrote the Cereals code has reduced the size of the botnet.
- Levi is a Finnish ski resort 93 miles (150km) north of the Arctic Circle where the season often runs well into May, but, like much of the rest of the world, it had to close in March, despite having had what locals described as the best snowfall in living memory. Not to be deterred, and wanting to ensure the next season is good, they are covering the snow in special fabric to preserve it through the summer and autumn months.
- We have reported on the interruptions experienced by people on Zoom conferences or home broadcasts, but a sound heard on a remote U.S. Supreme Court hearing has the Internet abuzz. As attorney Roman Martinez, representing the American Association of Political Consultants was talking about the Telephone Consumer Protection Act, which is intended to restrict intrusive automated recorded phone calls, there was a loud and clear sound of someone flushing a lavatory. There was, of course, speculation on Twitter - was it a coded one flush for yes, two for no? Would it become part of the official transcript? Martinez declined to comment, other than saying that he was on his landline, leaving many to wonder if he has a cordless phone...
Coronavirus round-up: A cyclist out for their daily exercise but using a GPS device from their car had to be escorted off the M58 by Lancashire Police after causing - but avoiding - a slow-motion crash, before following the advised route and finding himself back on the motorway, from where he had to again be escorted, fined and given a lesson in road safety and, we hope, learning how to switch his GPS from 'car' to 'cycle' mode. ● A gun-wielding driver drove into the midst of a "Salute to Nurses" parade in Oregon and threatened to hurt people - without hitting anyone - before overturning his car as police chased him. ● A gang of thieves in New Zealand took advantage of the lockdown to steal 97 rental cars from Auckland rental company Juicy, well-known in the country for its green-painted rental campervans. An appeal on social media, local support and observant police have led to 85 of the cars being recovered and 29 arrests made. ● The U.K.'s National Cyber Security Centre has received more than 160,000 forwarded emails advertising fake COVID-19 cures, unsafe masks and other virus-related scams, leading to 300 websites being shut down. ● A so-called "Plandemic" conspiracy video spread across social media as quickly as sites were removing it.
Scientists in England and the U.S. are studying hundreds of mutations of the COVID-19 virus, one of which seems to be becoming dominant and makes the virus more infectious. ● Levels of carbon dioxide emissions in India fell by 15% in March and are predicted to have falled by 30% in April with the country in lockdown, the first fall in 37 years, mostly as a result of reduced power demand from coal-burning generators due to industrial shutdown.
A video was posted to TikTok this week of a customer at a Kentucky gas station who had cut a large hole in the midde of her fask mask because "well since we have to wear 'em and it makes it harder to breathe, this makes it a lot easier to breathe"... ● Pete Hegseth, a host on Fox News, told his viewers that "now that we are learning more, herd immunity is our friend. Healthy people getting out there - they are going to have to have some courage!" prompting the entirely predictable backlash.
A new artwork by Banksy has been delivered to Southampton General Hospital. The 3' (1m) square mostly-monochrome painting shows a boy wearing dungarees and a t-shirt kneeling by a wastebin in which he has discarded his Batman and Spider-Man figures, and is instead holding up a nurse figure with her arms outstretched in Superman's flying pose. The painting will be displayed near the hospital's emergency department until the autumn when it will be auctioned to raise funds for the NHS charities. ● In 1847 the Native American Choctaw tribe sent $170 to Ireland for famine relief despite facing impoverishment themselves, a gift memorialised with a monument in County Cork. A GoFundMe campaign set up for the Navajo and Hopi nations who are facing the highest per capita infection rates in America with little recognition from the Trump administration [viz. below] has now raised more than $2.5m (£2.05m), thanks in no small part to a lot of donations from Ireland, the donors recalling the kindness shown to their ancestors. Fundraiser organiser Vanessa Tulley wrote "acts of kindness from indigenous ancesters past being reciprocated nearly 200 years later through blood memory and interconnectedness. Thank you, IRELAND, for showing solidarity and being here for us."
Singapore authorities are using a camera-equipped robot dog to patrol one of their parks to broadcast social-distancing guidelines and monitor how busy the park is. ● Poland officially held a presidential election last Sunday, but because the government and opposition were unable to agree on how it should be held, and the government failed to declare a natural disaster to legally postpone it despite 3/4 of people polled saying that they wanted it deferred, nobody - in a country of 38m people - actually voted. The Speaker of Poland's parliament is expected to annouce a new election to be held on the first available date. ● An aircraft carrying medical and humanitarian supplies was shot down by Ethiopian troops near the intersection of the borders of Ethiopia, Somalia and Kenya reportedly because it was flying too low and there had been a lack of communication leading them to suspect it was on a suicide mission by the al-Shabab militant group.
Update: Adrian Zamarripa, the five-year-old Utah boy who stole his parents' car keys and set off to drive to California to buy a Lamborghini, as reported in an earlier TFIr, has got to ride in a Lamborghini - as a passenger - thanks to local businessman Jeremy Neves, who told reporters that he was impressed by the boy's principles of success - "knowing what he wants, going after it" but "I'm not encouraging kids to go out and take their parents' car, and do anything else that's illegal. I'm not advocating that at all." Adrian's view of the Lamborghini? "That car's fast!"
Iran has called for a prisoner swap with the U.S. - because it has concerns for the health and welfare of Iranian nationals in American jails during the outbreak. ● A group of four CEOs and the president of the American Farm Bureau Federation were told to remove their face masks before meeting with Mike Pence in Iowa last week, hours after Pence had been told that his press secretary had contracted the virus. ● Jared Kushner, heading a group responsible for securing and distributing personal protective equipment (PPE) to certain in-need hospitals routinely directed them to prioritise requests delivered via Fox News regardless of the hospitals involved. ● Trump toured an Arizona Honeywell factory which is making masks, and wore... goggles, but no mask. Major kudos to whoever was in charge of the music played on the factory floor - Paul McCartney & Wings' 1973 hit "Live and Let Die" was playing behind footage of Trump. ● Trump met with a group of nurses in the Oval Office on Wednesday, National Nurses Day in America, and one mentioned that PPE supply had been "sporadic but it's manageable".The ever-considerateTrumpcalmy made a note and promised to look into ittold her "Sporadic for you, but not sporadic for a lot of people. That was fine, but I have heard we have a tremendous supply to almost all places."
Trump is despised by the group R.E.M. who have frequently demanded that he stop using their songs at rallies. The @PoliticsJoe Twitter account has posted a video putting Trump's own words over R.E.M.'s "Losing My Religion", entitled "Losing My Civilians". ● Also on Twitter George Takei (@GeorgeTakei, Star Trek's Mr Sulu) commented about the news from Russia: "When they first reported that Putin's official spokesman had contracted the coronavirus, the White House immediately issued a clarification that this did not mean Donald Trump."
Doctors Without Borders (Médecins Sans Frontières) is an international humanitarian group best known for providing health care to civilians caught in conflict zones around the world but now, for the first time in its history, it has a presence in the U.S. having dispatched a team to the Navajo Nation, practically ignored by the Trump administration in the virus outbreak. ● Trump continues to blame the Obama administration for almost everything including a lack of preparedness for the virus pandemic [Trump disbanded the Obama-era Pandemic Response Team], but Ronald Klain, who headed the response to Ebola for President Obama has revealed that the outgoing administration left a lengthy and detailed playbook for dealing with a pandemic - even releasing a photograph of the page specifically warning against respiratory pathogens - which Trump's administration ignored.
Joe Biden, in a lengthy op-ed for the Washington Post has written "It's been more than two months since Trump claimed that "anybody that wants a test can get a test." It was a baldfaced lie when he said it, and it still isn't remotely true. [..] Trump can't seem to provide it [widespread testing] - to say nothing of worker safety protocols, consistent health guidelines or clear federal leadership to coordinate a responsible reopening." ● Trump told the New York Times "In a way, by doing all this testing we make ourselves look bad." Yes, he is continuing to prioritise his own re-election chances over Americans' health. ● Trump continues to claim that America is leading the world in testing, even having giant signs at press briefings reading "AMERICA LEADS THE WORLD IN TESTING". It is true that more tests are being done in America than any other country, but America is a big country (and some people have been tested much more often than others). The per capita testing rate - 28.24 tests per 1,000 people - is behind more than 30 other nations, a fall of over ten places since April. ● Trump tried to defend his view that testing is nonsensical by arguing that Mike Pence's press secretary "tested very good for a long period of time and then all of a sudden today she tested positive... This is why the whole concept of tests aren't [sic] necessarily great. The tests are perfect, but something can happen between a test where it's good and then something happens... she was tested very recently and tested negative and then today, I guess, for some reason she tested positive." [At this point the Editor started banging his head on the table...]
Days after saying that the U.S. "needs a vaccine", and despite Dr Anthony Fauci's acknowledging "truth" in Joe Biden's assertion that "this isn't going to be over until we have a vaccine", Trump told reporters "I feel about vaccines like I feel about tests: this is going to go away without a vaccine. [..] It's going to go away, and we're not going to see it again, hopefully, after a period of time." ● Paula White Cain, Trump's spiritual advisor, meanwhile, said that "divine intervention and a supernatural turnaround" would solve the health crisis... ● For more than 10 years the EcoHealth Alliance has worked with the Wuhan Institute of Virology to develop cures for various types of coronavirus that spread from bats to humans, so are well-placed to be involved in the search for a COVID-19 vaccine. Or would be, if the National Institute of Health, under orders from the Trump administration, had not defunded their grant. EcoHealth Alliance president Peter Daszak told CBS News "This politicization of science is really damaging. You know, the conspiracy theories out there have essentially closed down communication between scientists in China and scientists in the U.S. We need that communication in an outbreak to learn from them how they control it so we can control it better. It's sad to say, but this will probably cost lives. By sort of narrow-mindedly focusing in on ourselves, or on labs, or on certain cultural politics, we miss the real enemy."
Dr Fauci told a Republican-led Senate panel this week that the real death toll in the U.S. is probably higher than the official 80,000 figure and warned that the Opening Up America Again plan would risk triggering a second bigger outbreak, contradicting Trump's official line that America is ready to reopen for business. Several states which have taken steps to begin opening up again are already reporting increased infection levels. ● President Obama has described Trump's response to the pandemic crisis as "an absolute chaotic disaster when that mindset - of 'what's in it for me' and 'to heck with everybody else' - when that mindset is operationalized in our government."
Having said that the coronavirus task force he set up was to be disbanded Trump has now said that it will be retasked with reopening the American economy. ● The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC), the leading national public health institute in America, developed a 17-page guide for reopening the economy including business plans and flow charts, which was to be published on May 1. The Trump administration buried it, telling the CDC that it "would never see the light of day". Naturally then, it has been leaked and contains far more sense than anything coming from the White House. ● Trump's Mother's Day Twitter storm [more on that below] included a plug for his reopened golf courses; as many commented, there are over 80,000 dead Americans and Trump is promoting his golf course, and continuing to use his office to promote his business, contravening the emoluments clause.
As has become clear in recent months it is not just the Democrats who are opposed to Trump. Steve Schmidt, a former strategist for the Republican Party told MSNBC this week that "If Barack Obama were the President of the United States, this [the response to the pandemic] would not have happened. We would have had competent professional people. We would have done what we needed to do early. [..] We would have had someone like Ron Klain in charge of it, not the confederacy of dunces that we see running around the West Wing. [..] No amount of gaslighting, delusion, fantasy happy talk [from Trump would change the fact that recovery will take years]." ● A campaign ad from Joe Biden has used Trump's own words in response to the developing pandemic to damn him. ● The Lincoln Project, the Republican group whose "Mourning in America" ad sent Trump into a Twitter meltdown last week raised a record $1m (£820,000) in the day after its broadcast and the response from Trump. George Conway, a co-founder of the group, told the Washington Post that "Trump's narcissism deadens any ability he might otherwise have had to carry out the duties of a president in the manner the Constitution requires. He's so self-obsessed, he can only act for himself, not for the nation. And it's why he reacts with such rage. He fears the truth." ● Another Republican group, Republicans for the Rule of Law, have launched two adverts on Fox News detailing how Trump has attempted to avoid oversight while in office, ahead of the Supreme Court hearing arguments over whether Congressional and New York grand jury subpoenas for Trump's tax records and financial papers covering a 10-year-period are in violation of executive privilege, which he has repeatedly claimed.
At a Rose Garden press briefing where Trump repeated his claim that America led the world in testing for COVID-19 Weija Jiang, the Asian-American CBS White House Correspondent asked him "Why is this a global competition to you when Americans are losing their lives every day?" Trump responded with "Maybe that's a question you should ask China." and tried to call another journalist for her question. When Weija pressed him on why he was saying that "to me, specifically" he said it was a nasty question and cut the briefing short. Late night TV host Stephen Colbert commented said that Trump "took his lack of balls and went home" adding "though it's no surprise he's leaving, 'cause 'I called on you and now I'm calling on the young lady in the back' is how he told all of his wives they were getting divorced." CNN has responded to Trump's behaviour by broadcasting a montage of his attacks and demeaning comments on female reporters, with political correspondent Abby Phillip commenting that "he seems to not be tolerant of taking difficult questions, particularly from women."
More 2015 tweets and interviews from Trump's Press secretary Kayleigh McEnany have come to light, including criticising Trump as a racist, as inauthentic (having donated to both parties in the past), as a showman and not a serious candidate. When asked about her comments at a press briefing McEnany blamed CNN then tried the Trump tactic of diverting to another subject. ● Last Sunday was Mother's Day in America. Barack Obama tweeted a picture of himself and Michelle with "Even if you can't give the moms in your life a hug today, I hope you can give them an extra thank you today. Thank you and Happy Mother's Day to the woman who makes it all possible. Love you, @michelleobama". Trump issued over a hundred tweets and retweets on Sunday, most about Michael Flynn, Trump's former national security adviser who was fired after admitting to lying to the FBI, a few about the coronavirus and a solitary "HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY" somewhere in the flood. Trump is attempting - again - to build a fake conspiracy theory that Barack Obama tried to sabotage the incoming administration by instigating FBI investigations, among other things, despite there being no evidence whatsoever. When asked by the press about 'Obamagate' on Monday Trump dodged the questions and claimed that Obama was involved in the "biggest political crime in American history", but, as is usual with Trump, offered no details or evidence. Pete Souza, Obama's official photographer while in office, offered a few photos of Obama committing "So many crimes. I fully expect to be subpoenad by the Attorney General" on Twitter. The 'crimes' included: talking on the phone, speaking with advisors, chatting with supporters, holding his wife's hand, using a selfie stick and holding an open umbrella for two other people... National security lawyer Bradley Moss told Fox News that the things Trump is apparently accusing Obama of having done were the very same things Trump did in the first years of his presidency.
Brad Parscale, Trump's re-election campaign manager recently tweeted "For nearly three years we have been building a juggernaut campaign (Death Star). It is firing on all cylinders." When people pointed out that the Death Stars in Star Wars all had fundamental flaws that allowed them to be destroyed, he used the Trump tactic of attempting to blame the media for coining the name, despite there being no evidence. [For the record, we think Trump is more Jar-Jar Binks than Palpatine... -Ed] ● Trump advisor Peter Navarro told Fox & Friends that last weekend's news programming [on other channels, we presume] "was a pity party" and "anybody who thinks this is the Great Depression doesn't understand either history or economics." The Great Depression was an event that took 10 years. Under Trump's mismanagement of the pandemic response unemployment rates and the economy have collapsed to similar levels in a couple of months. ● A photograph of Brian in the White House has taken Twitter by storm this week. Who is Brian? Brian is a large cockroach. He fits right in. ● We have not heard much about Trump's vanity wall since the COVID-19 outbreak started, but just when we thought enough taxpayer money had been wasted on it, Trump has said that he wants it painted black. When it was planned, it was deliberately left unpainted because the steel used could be left untouched for 30 years and stand up to desert conditions undamaged. If it is painted black it will require constant touch ups. The cost of painting would be at least another $500m (£409m). ● In an interview on Fox & Friends Trump boasted that "I learned a lot from Richard Nixon" to the hosts' rather evident amusement, not least because he said that the first thing he learned from studying the disgraced former President was "don't fire people"; over 21 administration officials were fired when he took office in favour of his unqualified-for-the-jobs cronies and his administration has a record 86% turnover rate.
Golden retriever Nigel (Gardener's World, 11), singer Betty White ("Where Is the Love", "Clean Up Woman", 66), singer Hillard 'Sweet Pea' Atkinson (Was Not Was, 74), magician Roy Horn (Siegfried and Roy, 75), songwriter Mark Barkan ("The Tra La La Song (One Banana, Two Banana)", "Pretty Flamingo", "She's a Fool", 85), teacher Rennie Williams (rescued several children in the 1966 Aberfan school disaster, 86), rock 'n' roll pioneer Little Richard ("Good Golly Miss Molly", "Tutti Frutti", "Long Tall Sally", 87), actor and comedian Jerry Stiller (The Ed Sullivan Show, Seinfeld, The King of Queens, 92), RAF veteran Flight Lieutenant William 'Terry' Clark (the penultimate remaining member of "The Few" who fought in the Battle of Britain, 101).
^ DUMBLEDORE BEAR'S LOTTERY PREDICTOR!
Dumbledore Bear, our in-house psychic predicts that the following numbers will be lucky:1, 17, 43, 46, 50, 51[UK National Lottery, number range 1-59]
You can get your very own prediction at http://www.simonlamont.co.uk/tfir/dumbledore.htm.
Little Jennifer and her parents were watching television and sharing a box of chocolates that had been given to them. "OK, Little Jennifer," her mother said, "that's enough chocolate for you. It's not good to go to bed on a full stomach."
Little Jennifer pouted as only she could, thought for a moment and said "That's OK, Mummy, I'll lie on my side."
^ ...end of line